Story Time With Remy LeBeau
by Midnight Auroua
Summary: Okay, kiddies, gather 'round. Remy gonna tell you a story. Everythin' between "once 'pon a time" to "happily ever after" ain't ever gonna be the same by the time I'm through wit' it.
1. Once 'pon a Time

**Okay. It's my first ever chapter fic. Let's see how this goes. I will try to update as quickly as possible but if I wanna graduate high school, at some point I'll have to do my homework. But all the reviews I received were so encouraging and I just can't get enough. Thank you everyone for your wonderful words. I seem to enjoy telling stories from Mr. LeBeau's POV, so I can't wait to hear your feedback on this new format I'm trying out. Please enjoy!**

**Chapter One: Once 'pon a Time**

Okay, kiddies, gather 'round. Remy gonna tell you a story.

What's funny? My name? What's so funny about Remy? Well, what makes your name so damn—I mean dang—special? What's your name anyway, pup? Amy? Your name is Amy? That's a stupid name. No substance. No character. See, _my _name got character.

Are you cryin'? Why are you doin' that? Hey, there, stop it. Don' cry. Your name ain't _that _bad, kiddo. It's…classic. Maybe a little borin' but there's no harm in that. No one makes fun of Amys. Except me. But my name is Remy. What do I know?

Okay. Everyone gather 'round. It's story time. Yes. I'm tellin' you a story. Why? What do you mean _why_? Why wouldn't I? Look, do you wanna hear the story or not? You do? Then sit your butts down and listen.

How many of y'all have heard of Cinderella? All of you? That's good. How many of _like _that story? All of you? See, kiddies, that ain't so good. And Remy gonna tell you why.

See, the original Cinderella fairy tale is borin'. 'Member what I said about substance earlier? That's what Cinderella is lackin'. Substance.

What do you mean you don' know what substance is? I don' know how to describe it. It's like…the stuff that makes things kinda…special. Damn—I mean dang—y'all got some short 'tention spans. Makin' Remy forget what I was talkin' 'bout in the first place. Oh, yeah. Cinderella.

The original story is fine and all but it's lackin' somethin' a little special. See, good ol' Remy knows a better version of Cinderella. And it's not 'bout some blonde wit' singin' birds and mice. Let Remy tell you somethin' you should always remember:

Mice ain't your friend. If one comes into your room, don't try to sing wit' it. You kill it. Or scream so someone else bigger can come and kill it for you. And I don' wanna hear nothin' 'bout how killin' is wrong. Mice are nasty. End of story. And as for birds, they get poop all over your brand new motorcycle. That ain't very nice of them, is it? _Non_, it isn't. So next time you see a bird, you throw a big ol' rock at it. Jus' don' let your mamma or papa see you do it.

You distracted me again. Where was I? Oh, yeah. The Cinderella movie. That's a borin' movie. That ain't even Disney's best movie. You know what is? _The Princess and the Frog_. Takes place in good ol' New Orleans. Remy loves the prince from that movie. And the princess is kinda pretty, too. Though I'm none too pleased at how they portrayed the Cajuns wit' that firefly. But Remy can forgive them cause that movie was good. The only movie that's better than that is _The Lion King._

What? Jus' come I'm a grown up don' mean I can't like Disney movies. They're classic.

The one movie Remy don' like is Cinderella. And Snow White, but that's cause that movie was borin' and she had an annoyin' voice. But Cinderella has so much potential. You do know what potential is, don' you? You do? Good. I didn' feel like splainin' that one to you.

The reason we're here—you and me and every other kid in this room—is to tell you the _real _story of Cinderella. But before we begin wit' the whole "once 'pon a time" thing, we gotta establish a few things.

One: the story don' take place in some far away land. It takes place in Louisiana. Do you know where that is? You don'? Hmm…it's way at the bottom of America. Right near the water. Y'all outta go there one day. And you should go to Mardi Gras. But, err, not 'til you older. In 'bout twelve or so years. Then, when you old 'nough, go to Mardi Gras. Trust Remy, it'll be the most fun you'll ever have. You might not remember it the next day but it'll be fun.

Okay. Item number two: Remy's version of Cinderella ain't starrin' no silly blonde. My Cindy has brown hair with white streaks in it. Now, don' ask me _why _there's white streaks in it. Remy's always wondered that himself. But, take my word for it kiddies, sometimes it's better not to ask. Remember that: Just accept, kiddos. No questions.

One more thing and then we can start the story. My version of Cinderella isn't named Cinderella. We gonna call her Roguearella. Rogue for short, kay? We good? Good.

I think I like you batch of kids. You're a smart bunch. Short 'tention span but that's okay. You also ask a few too many questions but you're young and none too bright so Remy can forgive that.

Where were we? Oh yeah.

Once 'pon a time…

**So that's the first chapter. Let me know what you think. Fingers crossed that the thoughts are positve. There will be more soon...enough. **

**-M.A.**


	2. In A Land Not So Far Away

**Two chapters in one night? What can I say? I'm addicted. **

**I must apologize for my short chapters. I promise, they'll get longer. And I promise there will be dialogue. It'll be dialogue provided by Remy LeBeau, which means it's gonna be rather...interesting. But it'll exist. And hopefully you'll like it. Enjoy and thank you for the lovely reviews. **

**Oh. Btw: Indigo-Night-Wisp, I am indeed a girl. Just wanted to clear that up for you. **

**Chapter Two: In A Land Not So Far Away **

Once 'pon a time, in a land not so far away—Louisiana, to be specific—there was a girl named Roguearella. Actually, her name was Rogue but her family wasn' very bright and called her that. They thought they were bein' funny but it was stupid. Roguearella is a stupid name. Can we agree on that, Amy? We can?

That's good. I think I'm goin' to like you, girl.

Anyway, Rogue used to have a nice family. But then one day, her mama got very sick and she passed on. It was a sad time in Roguey's life. Her papa thought that what she needed was a mama to make her feel better. So he married the first woman who struck his fancy. She had pretty red hair and dark blue skin.

What? What do you mean her skin is a weird color? In case you haven't noticed, the person who's tellin' you the story 'bout a girl wit' white streaks in her hair has black and red eyes. And we've only just begun. 'Member what I said 'bout acceptin' things wit'out question? This is one of those times. And it's only gettin' weirder from here.

I'm distracted again. You little snots—I mean kids—need to stop distractin' Remy. How's he s'posed to tell you a story if he's always gettin' distracted? Amy, do you 'member what I was sayin'? You do? Oh. Yes. Thank you, Amy.

Roguearella's papa married this blue skinned woman. Her name was Mystique. Mystique also had two daughters. So when Rogue's papa married Mystique, Rogue got two new sisters. Now, some of you may like havin' a little brother or sister. Some of you may want a little brother or sister. But Rogue did not like her new sisters very much. That's cause her siblin's weren't so very nice. But, if it makes y'all feel better, Rogue's step sisters looked normal.

The oldest sister was a goody-good red head who was very pretty. We're gonna call this red head sister Jean. The other sister, she won' so bad. She was jus' a little spoiled and more than jus' a little annoyin'. She was…perky. Wait. What?

What do you mean you don' understand what perky is? What kinda kids are you? You want me to 'splain perky? Damn—I mean dang—I don' know if I can. Um…

Have you ever had a lotta sugary foods and treats and all that fun stuff? You have? Of course you have. You're kids. Well, you know how after you eat all that sugary stuff, you have a lot of energy? Perky means it's like you have that sorta energy all the time wit'out havin' to eat all that sugar. We good now? Good.

The perky girl, she had brown hair. And her name is Kitty. Yes, like the cat. But don' let her hear you sayin' that. She don' much care for people meowin' at her. If you meow at her, she might punch you. And if you like me, you don' care for bein' punched very much.

But back to Roguearella.

She had a brand new family. A papa, a new mamma, and two new sisters. She wasn' very happy but she had her papa so she figured she could deal wit' her new situation. But Rogue wasn' very lucky.

You see kiddos, Rogue's papa also got very sick. Not long after that, he…took a nap. A very, very, very long nap that he wasn' goin' to wake up from. It broke little Roguey's heart. Plus, now she was stuck wit' her new family.

Don't be sad kids. Jus' 'cause it's sad now don' mean there ain't a happy endin' waitin' for her. That's somethin' else you should 'member: no matter how bad things get, a happy endin' is waitin' for you.

Don' ask questions and wait for your happy endin's. I sure do hope you can 'member that. Like I said, your 'tention spans ain't particularly long so I ain't gettin' my hopes up. But good luck. Back to the story.

There was one other thing 'bout Roguearella that made her sad. See, Rogue had a special power. But her powers stopped her from bein' able to touch people. 'Cause if Rogue touched another person, she could hurt them real bad. And since Rogue was a nice girl, she didn' want that to happen. So she wore gloves to make sure that she could touch people wit'out hurtin' them. But Roguearella missed bein' able to touch people.

What? Oh. Well, she tried to control her powers. But it wasn' very easy for her. She never stopped tryin'. But it wasn' easy and she hadn' succeeded yet. But she never stopped tryin'.

'Member how Remy said that Rogue's new family wasn' very nice? Well the reason I said that was because even though they lived in _her _house, they made her work as their own maid. Poor Roguey. She had to cook and clean and wash their clothes. But the worst part 'bout her new life was the cookin' part. Not 'cause she hated cookin'. It was one of the few things Rogue enjoyed doin'. Problem was, Rogue couldn' cook if her or anyone else's life depended on it.

When Rogue made dinner, don' feel bad for her. Feel bad for those who have to eat it.

How do I know? Jus'…trust Remy.

Rogue would have to do all the work Mystique told her to do. Then when she was done wit' that, she would have to go and brush all of Jean's red hair and listen to her step sister go on and on and on 'bout borin' stuff no one cared about. And after that, Kitty would make her go to the local market and go shoppin' wit' her. Rogue didn' like shoppin' or listenin' to Kitty talk the whole time, or carryin' all the bags.

At the end of the day, Rogue would drag her tired body upstairs and—

What? No.

You can't _literally _drag yourself anywhere. It's jus' an expression. It means that she was very tired and had trouble stayin' awake 'fore she got to her bed. Geez. How old are y'all? Five? Six? Remy sure do hope he won't this dumb when he was that old.

But that's okay. You're young. It ain't your fault you ain't the brightest. Remy is sure you'll be bright as a bulb one day. It's ju' right now, you're 'bout a two watt. But that's okay. It'll get better.

'Specially wit' you, Amy. Remy got faith in you, kid.

There y'all go again. Distractin' poor Remy.

After a long day of actin' like the family's slave, Roguey went upstairs to her room. In there, in a special box she kept tucked away, there was a pair of gloves. They were very pretty. White as snow and soft as silk. They used to belong to her mama. Her papa gave them to Rogue right before he took his very long nap.

These gloves were very special to Rogue. Even though she always had to wear gloves to make sure she didn' hurt others, Rogue never wore these. Partly 'cause she didn' wanna dirty them up. But also 'cause she wanted to be able to control her powers the day she wore them. Why?

Rogue wanted to wear them 'cause she wanted to. Not 'cause she had to.

So every night, Rogue would go into her room, pull out the gloves, and try 'til she was worn out to control her powers. She concentrated as hard as she could but never seemed to be able to get the hang of it. But she never stopped tryin'.

'Member that too. Don' ask too many questions, there's always a happy endin' waiti' for you, and don' stop tryin'.

Woo-wee. We buildin' a pretty long list, ain't we?

Hey now, why y'all lookin' so glum? What do you mean the story is sad? Well it has to be sad. If it was happy the whole way through, there would be no point in tellin' it, now would there? You gotta be patient, kiddies. But Remy promise, the happiness is right 'round the corner. But we gotta take our time gettin' to it. And we gotta set up the plot.

You don' know what a plot is? You know what? Don' worry 'bout it. All you need to know is that Remy jus' can't dive right into the story. He's gotta set everythin' up first. But if it makes you feel any better, we all done settin' up Roguey's part of the story. Now we gotta set up the next part.

Yes, there is another part.

Well maybe in the Disney version, there was only one part. But this ain't the Disney version. This is the Remy version. And in the Remy version, the handsome prince Rogue falls in love wit' has a story to be told, too.

And trust Remy, you definitely gonna wanna hear that part of the story.


	3. There Lived A Very Handsome Prince

**Chapter three is here! Yay! I got three chapters up in one weekend. I doubt I'll be able to update as much during the week because I have responsibilities and whatnot that I have to attend to. So enjoy this.**

**Anyway, TheBlueFoxtrot A Samba asked a very good question. "Where did he get these kids from?". Did Remy steal them? Did he break into a day care center just to tell them his twisted version of Cinderella? Perhaps he's acting as a substitute teacher for a kindgergaten class? I certainly hope that it's not the last one. In fact, as the author of this story, I can tell you it's not. But I can tell you that your question will be answered before the story ends. Be patient, my dear BlueFox. And Servant of Time, thank you for the suggestions! I plan on incorporating them. Well, onward to the third chapter! Enjoy!**

**Chapter Three: There Lived A Very Handsome Prince**

In Louisiana, in a neighborhood fancier than the one Roguearella stayed in, there lived this story's prince. His fancy palace was the French Quarter. And don' start complainin' 'bout how accurate this story is. You ain't here for accuracy. You're here to be entertained, _non_? So if Remy says that he lived in the French Quarter, then dammit—I mean dang it—he lived in the French Quarter.

The prince was the most handsome prince ever. There was no one who was more attractive than this prince, with his devil may care smile, perfect hair, and body that would make a Greek god jealous. Little ladies, you can't appreciate this. You're young and you're ideas of attractive probably involves purple dinosaurs that sing creepy songs 'bout love. But one day, when you're older, you gonna remember this prince and then you'll realize what bad taste you have now. Trust Remy. He's always right 'bout things like this.

But back to this handsome prince.

His name? You want to know his name? I was gettin' there. Keep your diapers on. Err, do y'all still wear diapers? Heh. Most of you don'. I s'pose that's good. Anyway, this gorgeous prince's name was Remy.

Yes, jus' like me. Yes, we have the same name. What's wrong wit' that? Maybe it's jus' a little cowinky-dink, eh? What's wrong with two incredibly sexy men havin' the same—

What's a cowiky-dink? You gotta be kiddin' me. You know what, it don' matter. Let's jus' get back to the story. You ain't gonna distract Remy this time. No sir.

Now where was I? Hmm…oh yes.

Now you would think being the most attractive man on the face of the earth and livin' in a fancy ol' palace would be the ideal life. But Remy had his own problems. See, kiddies, remember this: no one, no matter how good their life seems, has it perfect. So add that item to your list.

Don' ask too many question, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' stop tryin', and no one has it perfect. And didn' I mention somethin' earlier about rats and birds? Well, whatever I said, add that to the list too.

The reason Remy's life wasn' perfect was because despite havin' 'nough money to buy whatever he wanted, he couldn' get the things he truly wanted. I bet you wonderin' what Remy wanted, _non_? Well, what he wanted was to be able to go outside the palace and have some fun. He was in Louisiana. Louisiana is _fun_. There's no reason to _not _have fun. But his parents had other ideas for him.

Who are his parents, you ask? Well, that's a very good question. One good ol' Remy will be happy to answer. No, not the prince Remy. Me Remy. Keep up, kiddies. Amy, do you follow me? You do? I knew I liked you, kiddo.

His mama was a nice ol' lady named Mattie. She was the kinda lady who could cook like no one's business, take care of a house, and still take time to discipline you if you been a bad kid. And trust Remy, you don' wanna anger that woman. She was as sweet as she was feisty and Remy loves her.

His papa was a quieter man. He was also as bald as an egg. Very optimistic—that means he always saw the good—to the point of bein' a pain in the behind. Also, after an accident, Prince Remy's papa couldn't walk. So he got 'round by usin' a wheel chair. The king's name was Charles but everyone jus' called him Charlie. Even if Charlie wasn' very fond of this name, people called him that anyway.

But, we need to establish right here and now, that they weren't married. 'Cause that's jus' gross. Even though they were King and Queen together, they weren' married. Nasty.

What…what do you mean how did they have a baby? You're too young to be askin' those sorta questions. Why? 'Cause I said so. What you need to do is go home and ask your mama and papa those questions, not Remy. I ain't here to tell you that kinda story.

But, if you are that interested in where the prince came from, the king and queen adopted him. See, before Remy was a prince, he used to live on the streets. He was very poor and skinny and needed a haircut real bad. The way Prince Remy survived on the streets was by stealin'. And let me tell you, Remy was the best thief there was. No one was better. He could steal a man's fortune wit'out bein' noticed. Not only was Remy good at it, but it was also the most fun he had. Stealin' is fun.

Err…but don' steal. It's bad. And wrong. Jus' 'casue it's some of the best fun you can ever have in your life don' mean you should do it. So don' steal. Ever. It's fun.

I mean bad. It's bad. Very, very bad. But we ain't gonna add that to our list 'cause it's not _that_ big of a deal. So if you forget that, Remy won' be _that _mad.

So one day the king and queen were travelin' through the kingdom and saw little Remy. Queen Mattie tapped King Charlie on the shoulder.

"Oh, Charlie, look at the little boy," she said. "Isn't he incredibly handsome?"

"Indeed he is, Mattie," Charles agreed. Charles had a very persuasive voice. It sounds a whole lot like Patrick Stewart's voice, actually. Please tell me you know who Patrick Stewart is. You don'?

Okay. Remy gonna give you a homework assignment. After we finish the story, go home and watch _Star Trek. _That outta clear up a lotta your questions. But we gotta get back to the story.

"I think that that little boy will be a great addition to the family," Mattie said.

"I believe you are right. I'm sure that he is as smart and charming as he is attractive. And _my_, he is attractive."

So the king and queen adopted little orphan Remy. And little orphan Remy became Prince Remy.

Now, don' go thinkin' that he won' grateful for the new life that Mattie and Charlie gave him. Remy was very thankful. But when he became a prince, he wasn' allowed to do the same things he used to do when he lived on the streets. He had lotta responsibilities and whatnot. These responsibilities didn' leave a lotta room for fun. Remy tried to not let it get to him but he started to get restless.

Here's where Remy was a little naughty.

After years of livin' in the Quarter bein' a _relatively_ good boy, Remy did a bad thing. First, he paid one of the servants to get him some clothin' that won't so fancy as the stuff he had to wear all day. After he got the clothes, he paid the guards to not follow him or tell the king and queen what he was doin'. Finally, he paid the boy in charge of the horses to let Remy borrow one for the day wit'out tellin' no one.

That's right, kiddies. Remy was gonna run away for the day.

**I know I had mentioned having longer chapters. In fact, this chapter was supposed to be longer. But I find it easier to write shorter ones. I can publish them faster and still have time to attend to homework, my family, and my boyfriend. And I kinda love these shorter ones that end on semi-cliff hanger-y notes. **

**NEXT CHAPTER: Rogue and Prince Remy meet! Chaos ensues. We add more items to the list. The kids get a French lesson. Fun stuff. Until we meet again...**

**-M.A.**


	4. One Day The Prince Met A Girl

**Is this chapter four? Is chapter four here? Indeed it is!**

**I just can't get enough of this story and your reviews. They keep me going. And do you know I managed to do my homework and add a new chapter to this story in one night? You should be proud of me. Checkerboard Soundtrack, I like sunshine reviews. Any review is a good one. Stay patient, BlueFox. Even though, if you guys were interested in telling me your ideas as to where Remy acquired a room full of kids, I would be more than happy to hear them. In fact, I might even use one...*gasp***

**Anyway, enjoy the new chappie!**

**Chapter Four: One Day The Prince Met A Girl **

After Prince Remy got outta the Quarter, he tied his horse up somewhere outside of town and traveled 'round New Orleans on foot.

'Member what I said 'bout New Orleans bein' fun? Well the prince hadn' had a chance to really experience the fun of good ol' Nawlins since he had been adopted by the queen and king. And now that he was outta the Quarter for the day, he planned on havin' as much fun as possible 'fore he had to go back home.

What do you mean why wouldn' he jus' not go back home? 'Cause he's a _prince_. Prince's jus' can't runaway willy-nilly whenever they feel so inclined. They got responsibilities. And kiddies, no matter how bad those responsibilities are, you can't run away from them. 'Member that. In fact, we gonna add that to our list.

Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, and somethin' about rats and birds.

As I was sayin'—Amy, what did you jus' say?

Young lady, what did you say?

I don' care how long the list gets, you don' say that word. Where did you hear such language? Me? From _me_? Oh. Um…

How many of y'all are French? None? Well, how many of y'all got parents that are French? How about any Canadians? _Non_? Not one? Okay. Remy gonna tell y'all a secret. But you can't tell no one. Not your mama, not your papa, not even your little puppy or kitty. This is jus' gonna be the secret between me and you.

Swearin' is bad. You ain't s'posed to do it. Ever. Yes, I know I said a few bad words but that don' mean that's okay.

It doesn' have to make sense. I'm an adult. We constantly say things and make rules that don' make sense. You better start gettin' used to it now while you're young.

But that ain't the point. The point is that swearin' is bad. And if your parents—especially your parents, Amy—hear you usin' those kinda words, they gonna be very mad. If my _Tante _heard me usin' that sorta language, she woulda skinned me alive.

No. Not _literally_. Geez.

Swearin' is bad. But if you gotta swear real bad, don' do it in English. Most everyone you interact wit' is gonna understand English and if they hear you sayin' that sorta stuff, they ain't gonna be none to pleased. So what you need to do is learn how to say those sorta words in a language not everyone understands. So I want y'all to repeat after Remy.

Merde. _Merde_. Mah-air-dud. Merde. That's right. Say it one more time for Remy.

Good. You got it down. Amy, you might wanna work on your French accent sweetie, but that's okay. 'Cause you won' be usin' those bad words. What? Okay. You will be usin' that bad words but no one will know what you're sayin'. 'Cept good ol' Remy here. And the other kids in the room.

Don' worry 'bout what it means. Does it matter? Jus' know that it's a bad word. One you should never, ever say. 'Cause swearing is bad. Unless it's in French. Well, that's bad too. Jus' not as bad. You know what? Nevermind. Don' swear.

Dammit—I mean dang it. I mean _zoot_—y'all made me forget what I was sayin'. Somethin' 'bout…oh yeah.

Eventually, Prince Remy he knew that he would have to go home. He jus' wanted the day to himself. A day to be normal again. So he walked 'round Nawlins. And man oh man, what a fun place it was to be. Music is playin' everywhere. It's the best music on the planet. Much better than that Bieber boy. If you don' trust anythin' else Remy tells you today, trust that.

So Remy walked through the streets, happy jus' to be listenin' to music and bein' on the street. He watched the people talkin' and laughin' and generally have a good time and he was glad he was able to be apart of it. The smell of the Cajun spices filled the streets. It made Remy hungry but he didn' wanna stop to eat 'cause he was havin' too much fun. So he jus' kept walkin' and listenin' to good music and smellin' good food and smilin'.

As he walked around, he spotted two girls walkin' not too far ahead of him. One of them seemed to be talkin' her pretty little head off while the girl next to her was carryin' a bunch of bags. She was carryin' so many bags, her shoulders were saggin' under the weight of all of them. But she was strong and kept on walkin'.

That's right, kiddies. The girl wit' all the bags was Rogue.

Kitty had decided to go shoppin' and took Rogue wit' her so she could have someone to talk to and someone to carry her bags. Naturally, Rogue wasn' very pleased about any of this but it's not like she could fight back so she went along wit' Kitty while her step-sister talked about boys and clothin' and borin' thing that people didn' care about. Besides, Roguey was kinda glad to be out the house at least for a few hours. 'Cause she knew she had a lotta work to do when she got back home and she couldn' stop 'til it was bedtime.

Prince Remy watched the girls walk in front of him for a long time. After lookin' at them for awhile, Remy decided that for a second time that day, he was gonna be naughty. He couldn' help it. He hadn' been out the Quarter unsupervised for a little over ten years. He was itchin' to get out and misbehave. And when Prince Remy saw all those bags Rogue was carryin', he suddenly remembered all those days in the past where he used to steal all the time.

All the sudden, stealin' sounded really fun to him. He hadn' forget how to do it. It was just a matter of whether or not he would do it.

What do you think Remy did? Do you think he stole one of the bags or did he let Rogue get away?

Wow.

You're wrong. Wow. I never thought kids could be so wrong so many times in one day. Y'all sure are showin' Remy wrong. Of course the prince decided to steal the bags. Clearly, y'all don' understand what kinda character Remy is.

You don'? Well, I'm tellin' you that he stole it.

_Qui vole un oeuf vole un boeuf_.

What does that mean? It means once a thief, always a thief. You kids need to learn French. It's the language of love. Don' listen to those nay sayers—those are people who don' want you to do what you wanna do—and don' learn Spanish. Learn French. It's the best language ever.

Let's add that to our list.

Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, learn French, and somethin' about rats and birds.

So the prince came up behind the girls real slowly so they wouldn't hear him comin'. Kitty was talkin' so much that both the girls were completely distracted. So Remy waited for the perfect moment and then ran. He ran straight for the girls and when he was close 'nough, he grabbed the biggest bag outta Rogue's hand and kept runnin'. He didn' look back. He jus' ran.

Remy laughed and smiled as he ran far away from the girls. He was havin' so much fun, he couldn' help but laugh out loud. For just an instant, he was completely happy and at ease and he felt like he had the world at his feet. But that feelin' ended rather quickly. 'Cause all the sudden, Remy heard a word that I don' feel comfortable repeatin'. He turned 'round to see who would say such a word and saw Rogue runnin' after him. And kiddos, when I say Rogue looked mad, I mean Rogue looked _mad_.

She had dropped all her bags wit' Kitty and was chasin' after the prince like her life depended on it. Remy stopped smilin' and started runnin' even faster. He hadn't expected to be chased. He wasn' ready for that. So Remy ran as fast as his long, perfectly sculpted legs would carry him. But no matter how fast he ran, Rogue seemed like she was only a couple of steps behind him.

They ran through the streets and past people and 'round corners and in between buildin's. Remy hoped that by takin' a weird, crazy route, he would lose Rogue along the way. But the _fille_—that's French for girl—she was very persistent. And Remy?

He was startin' to get a little tired from all the runnin' he was doin'.

Remy ran down and alley. Rogue followed him. Maybe Remy was particularly tired at that point. Maybe Rogue was jus' extra fast for that one second. Either way, she picked up speed and threw herself forward.

Yes, Amy, she _literally _did it. She threw herself. And when she did, she managed to grab hold of Remy. The two of them went tumblin' and 'fore they knew it, they were lyin' in the dirt in the ground.

Rogue was stronger than she looked. So when tackled Remy, it took him a minute to think straight again. When he finally was able to, he saw Rogue crawlin' toward her bag. Remy reacted wit'out really thinkin'. He jus' reached out, grabbed her ankle and yanked Rogue back onto the ground.

"Oh no you don't," he told her.

Rogue tried to wiggle outta his grip but Remy was very strong and she couldn'. So she turned so she was facin' him. And let me tell you kids, she looked mad 'nough to spit. Really. If looks could kill, Remy woulda been dead three times over. You think the angry look on her face would be the main thing he noticed. But it wasn'.

See, Rogue was very beautiful. And all Remy could do was look at her pretty face and wonder how lucky was he that he was able to steal a bag from the prettiest girl in all of Louisiana.

Don' laugh. It is not "mushy". It's romance. It's love. Stop laughin'. One day, some little boy is gonna walk up to one of you ladies and tell you that he think you're the prettiest girl in Louisiana and it won' be so funny then, now will it? And boys, one day some girl is gonna make you some bubblin', hormonal idiot. When this day happens, you gonna remember me and I'm tellin' you know: Remy told you so.

Now quit laughin'. This is a romantic story and at some point romance is bound to happen. Don' laugh at it. Embrace it. And hush your butts up and listen to the story.

As I was sayin' Remy looked at Rogue and thought that she was the prettiest girl who he had—stop laughin'!—who he had ever seen. Even while she was frownin', he could see the beauty shinnin' through. The only thing he couldn' see was her hair. See, Rogue had wrapped up all her hair in a scarf so Remy couldn' see that her hair was brown and white. All he could see was her face.

But trust Remy, it was a beautiful face.

How do I know it was beautiful? Jus'…trust me.

The prince couldn' believe his eyes. He was so stunned, he forgot that he had jus' stolen from the woman. He forgot that he was a prince in disguise. He forgot that they were sittin' in the dirt in an alley somewhere in Nawlins. All he could think to say was:

"You're beautiful."

And how did Rogue respond? Well, she responded with a _very _ladylike:

"Bite me."

Then she pulled the foot that Remy wasn' holdin' back, and kicked him square in the chest.

**Yay! Chapter four is all done!**

**I'm sorry if my one sentence of French is wrong. Feel free to correct me. I failed French because the most distracting (and really hot) guy sat next to me in French and I totally flunked out cause of him. He was hilarious. And cute...**

**Right. I have a boyfriend. One who I love very much. But you don't care about that. You care about what's happening in chapter five.**

**NEXT CHAPTER: Rogue and Remy have an actual conversation, Remy receives an ultimatum, and we add more stuff to the list. **


	5. But The Girl Didn' Like Him Very Much

**Did I publish two chapters in one MONDAY night for you all? Why yes. Yes, I did. And if that isn't love. I don't know what is. So please enjoy. **

**Chapter Five: But The Girl Didn' Like Him Very Much**

Prince Remy fell right onto his tushy, gettin' dirt all over his pants. He shook the confusion from his head and looked back up at the girl. But she was already on her feet, grabbin' her bag and walkin' away from Remy. She was also grumblin' some not so nice words under her voice but that's not somethin' I feel y'all need to hear.

Remy really didn' know why he felt compelled to follow the girl. But he jumped to his feet and followed behind her. This is one of those times where y'all jus' shouldn' ask questions and accept things as they is. And the way things is right now is that Remy was infatuated wit' the girl who jus' kicked him flat on his, err—butt.

"Hey," Remy hollered. He touched her shoulder. "Wait a—"

'Fore he could finish speakin', Rogue swung 'round and knocked him in the head wit' the bag he had jus' stolen. It knocked Remy back onto his butt. He rubbed his achin' head.

"What the heck you got in there, _Cherie_? A brick?"

She put her hand on her hip and gave Remy one helluva—I mean heck—of a glare. "You wanna find out the hard way?" With that, she turned and kept on walkin' away.

Hmm? What did you say, pup? Oh. Yes, you're right. The prince shoulda jus' left her alone and gone back to the Quarter. But if he weren' persistent, then we wouldn' have a story. And didn' y'all came here for a story, _non_? You did. So quit punchin' holes in Remy's story and enjoy it. You don' see Amy over there pokin' holes in my story do you? So take a note from Amy.

As I was sayin', Remy followed behind Rogue.

"What's your name, _fille_?"

"You wanna feel how hard I can punch, Swamp Rat?"

"No need to call names."

"You been callin' me a buncha names," Rogue pointed out.

"But those are _nice _names," Remy insisted.

"I got a real mean right hook you're 'bout to experience first hand."

"Promises, promises…."

Remy asked Rogue what she had in her bag again. Rogue called him another not so nice name. Then Remy asked Rogue what her name was and she threatened to kick him in a place that you should never kick a man. Never. Don' ever hit any man in that spot. Ever.

In fact, Remy thinks we outta add that item to the list.

Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, learn French, don' hit a man in that one spot, and somethin' about rats and birds.

Wait. You wanna know where that spot is? Why? Jus' so you can use that knowledge for evil purposes? Nuh-uh. No way. You ain't gonna fool ol' Remy. You gonna figure it out sooner or later so don' worry 'bout it now. You know what you outta worry 'bout? Roguearella. And we can't worry 'bout that if you keep askin' Remy stuff you're too young to be askin' 'bout.

So Remy followed Rogue 'round. He jus' wanted to know a little bit 'bout the girl. You know what he _did _find out? That she _did _have a mean right hook. It was so mean, it knocked the prince back on his behind—he was really gettin' sick of that, by the way—but he jus' got back up.

"Swamp Rat, why won't you leave me alone?" she asked, as they got back into town. She started lookin' 'round for Kitty, but there were a lotta people. Plus, the prince was _very _handsome. Have I mentioned that before? I have? Oh. Well trust me.

It's somethin' worth repeatin'.

He was so handsome, it was kinda distractin' to Rogue. But she wouldn' admit that to him or anythin'. But he knew.

"'Cause I think you're pretty and I wanna know more 'bout you."

"You tried to steal my stuff."

Remy reminded Rogue that he apologized for that. Rogue reminded Remy that he actually _didn't _apologize for it. Remy then said that it was implied that he was sorry. Rogue called him another name.

"Why do you wear gloves?" Remy asked.

That, kiddies, was the wrong question. See, Rogue was very sensitive 'bout the fact she couldn' control her powers. So when the prince asked her that question, Rogue got very angry. And when I say very angry, I mean she knocked Remy clean off his feet and onto the ground. He was left gaspin' for air.

Don' make fun of Remy. He wasn' beat up by a girl. Rogue ain't jus' any girl. She's a very _strong _girl. Stronger than the average girl. But that don' mean that Remy ain't stronger. 'Member what I said? 'Bout him havin' a body of a Greek god? That means he's gone perfect muscles. Washboard abs. Biceps. The whole nine yards.

Stop makin' fun of Remy…

It ain't nice. So stop it.

Besides, he was kinda fakin' a little. He knew what he was doin'. You see, even though Rogue hit him hard, it wasn' so hard that he couldn' get back up and follow her some more. But Remy didn' want her to know that. 'Stead, he laid on the ground and moaned dramatically. Remy was a very good actor.

And Rogue? She ain't as mean as she wants everyone to believe. So when she saw how bad she had hurt Remy, she felt a little bad. She thought 'bout it for a minute. Then she decided she should at least make sure that Remy won' hurt. So she turned 'round and walked back to where he was lyin' on the ground.

"Swamp Rat?" she asked.

Instead of answerin', Remy just groaned. Loudly. Pitifully. In a not so gentle way, Rogue nudged him wit' her foot. That actually did hurt so Remy moaned again. Sighin' 'cause she was kinda annoyed, Rogue dropped herself to the ground next to him.

She asked him if he was okay. He shook his head. Rogue got a little more worried and pulled his head into his lap. It was when he was lyin' there that Remy smiled up at her. Rogue realized that he wasn't hurt and groaned herself.

**"You never give up…do you?" she asked him, shakin' her head. One piece of her hair slipped out from 'neath her scarf. It was a brown piece. Remy reached up to touch it but Rogue slapped his hand away.

Remy grinned at her some more anyway.

"What kind of thief would I be if I did, _chere_?" He gestured at their current position. An' look where it landed me."**

Rogue rolled her eyes and then, wit'out so much of a word or a kiss, she pushed Remy out her lap and walked away.

Did he follow her? Trust me kids, he wanted to. He really did. But when he stood up, Rogue was lost in the crowd. He woulda looked for her but his vision was blocked by two very big lookin' Quarter guards.

That's right, kiddies. Remy got caught.

They gave the prince a very disappointed look but wit'out sayin' anythin', they led Remy back to the Quarter.

The whole trip back to his home, he was freakin' out. He was 'fraid he was gonna be in big trouble. And Queen Mattie wasn' gonna take kindly to her son runnin' way. No sir. Remy won' so worried 'bout Charlie.

But Mattie was scary.

But Remy didn' get in trouble like he thought. Instead, he was brought to his parents room. They looked very serious. And that worried Remy.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

His parents sighed. They then reminded their son 'bout a law for their kingdom…state…thingy.

See, Remy was 'bout to turn twenty-one. And in Nawlins, when the prince turned twenty-one, he had to get married or else he wouldn' be a prince no more.

Why? Because that's the law. It was one of those dumb rules that adults make that don' make no sense. But those laws exist and unfortunately, Remy had a problem. 'Cause he _liked _bein' a prince. But he didn' wanna get married. But he had a 'nother option.

That option was to marry a girl his family had saved sorta as a…backup plan. Remy could either fall in love real fast before his birthday or he could marry the girl his family had as a backup plan.

You wanna know what was wrong wit' the backup plan girl?

That girl's name was Belladonna. And there was more stuff wrong wit' dat girl than I can begin to name...

****These are lines from Uncanny X-Men. I couldn't help but sprinkle a little bit of comic book Romy into my Evo Romy. **

**I"m loving your ideas about where Remy got the kids from. MORE! Bring me more ideas. Hurry. And I will try to hurry and spit out more chapter for you. But for now...bed time for me. Two chapters in one night has worn me out. Goodnight, darlings.**

**-M.A.**


	6. So The Prince Invited Her To A Party

**It's chapter six! Rogue and Remy have met. The threat of Belladonna has been introduced. Where can we go from here? Well, let's find out...**

**Chapter Six: So The Prince Invited Her To A Party**

A couple of days after Remy's parents told him that he had to get married, the prince had an idea. He decided that instead of havin' to marry that she-wolf Belladonna, he would instead have a big ol' party where all the girls in all of Nawlins were invited. He was hopin' that if he had every girl in one room, he would meet one he liked 'nough to marry her. But trust me, anythin' was better than marryin' Belladonna.

What was wrong wit' her? Didn' I just tell you that there was more stuff wrong wit' the girl than I can begin to name? I know I said that so why do you want Remy to start namin' all those features? What's your name, kid? Yeah, you. You been askin' me a lotta questions and I wanna know your name.

Scott? _Scott_? Pffff.

Figures.

Well, _Scott_, if you are that interested, I s'pose I can begin to name a few of Belladonna's more horrible features.

First, the girl was jus' plain ol' crazy. And I don' mean looney tune crazy. I mean "Remy, you were s'posed to be home at eight-o-clock and it's eight fifteen so you must be cheatin' on me" crazy. She was the kinda woman who one minute was sweeter than sugah and honey and the next she was throwin' a _very _expensive vase—that may or may not have been paid for—at your head 'cause you picked up some diet sodas for her and she took that as you sayin' she needed to lose some weight.

The sodas were on sale for buy one get one free. It was a good deal. It wasn' my fault she felt insecure, dammit!

Um…dang it.

Look, Remy don' wanna talk 'bout why Belladonna was crazy but jus' trust me, the woman weren' all thee in the head. Even if she was beautiful, she was crazy. Don' always trust a pretty face, kiddos.

I feel like we should add that to our list. Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, learn French, don' hit a man in that one spot, don' always trust a pretty face, and somethin' about rats and birds

Belladonna has a pretty face but Remy didn' wanna marry her.

So he had the idea to throw a big ol' party for all the single girls of Nawlins to come to. That way, maybe he could find a girl to marry.

What'd you say Amy? Ha. Yes.

If he liked one, the he was sure to put a ring on it.

_Scott_, why can't you contribute to the story like Amy does? 'Stead of askin' me all sorts of silly questions.

But anyway, so Remy made a buncha invitations and had them sent out to all the girls in the land.

Roguearella was at home the day she got her invitation. She was brushin' Jeans hair. It was a real annoyin' job 'cause Jean had a whole lotta hair and liked to talk to whole time Rogue did it.

"Blah, blah, blah, telepathy," she said, wavin' her hands 'round while she spoke. "Blah, blah, blah, I'm annoyin', blah, blah, blah Remy LeBeau, blah, blah, is the most, blah, handsome man on the planet, blah."

"That's nice, Jean," Rogue said, noddin' her head even though she hadn' listened to a single word the red head said.

Jean jus' wrinkled her nose and told Rogue to be quiet and keep brushin' her hair. Rogue sighed and did as she was told. Jean talked and talked. But before she could start talkin' 'bout somethin' Rogue _really _didn' care 'bout, there was a loud knock at the front door.

"Aren't you going to get that?" Jean asked.

Growlin' under her breath, Rogue set the brush down and headed to the front door. When she opened the door, there was a man in a funny hat and ugly blue tights standin' there lookin' real bored. As if he didn' look silly enough in his blue tights and funny hat, he also had on a pair of ugly, unflatterin' red sunglasses. And his hair won' nearly as nice as Prince Remy's.

Rogue put her hand on her hip and asked him who he was.

"Scott," the man said. "Prince Remy's personal servant."

"You look stupid."

"I know."

Rogue asked Scott—what? No, _Scott_, this character ain't based off of you. As silly as your name might be, Remy don' dislike you 'nough to put you in such a stupid outfit. That privilege belongs to someone else completely.

Rogue asked Scott what he wanted. He pulled out a scroll—don' ask from where he pulled it out—and read it to Rogue. It said that two weekends from that day, the prince would be throwin' a big ol' party with yummy food and great jazz music and beautiful ladies. As he was readin', Mystique, Jean, and Kitty came up behind Rogue and listened. All the women got excited listenin' to Scott talk—not 'cause his voice was nice or nothin'. He didn' even have an accent.

Mystique was excited because she always wanted to be grotesquely rich and if one her daughters was married to a prince, then she would retire to wealth and selfishness. Kitty wanted to go to a big ol' fancy party and now that she was invited to one, she had a reason to go shoppin' some more. And Jean? Well, she was excited 'cause it sounded interestin' and all but she was also kinda caught up starin' at Scott.

And Rogue? Well, she wasn' the kinda gal who liked goin' to parties like that. But the idea of gettin' out the house, gettin' outta her house work for a few hours was quite appealin' to her.

By the time Scott was done readin' his invitation, all four women were really lookin' forward to the ball.

"Here's a copy of the invitation," Scott said. He tried to hand it to Rogue but Jean shoved her out the way and took it from him instead. When she did, she let her hand touch his jus' for a second.

"Thank you," she said. And she gave him a look. What kinda look? Trust me, kiddo, when you're older, a girl will give you the same kinda look and you'll know exactly what Remy is talkin' 'bout.

Scott blushed and bowed. "You're welcome. Um..see you there."

Jean told him that he would definitely see her. Rogue watched the two of them talkin' and rolled her eyes. She headed upstairs to start gettin' ready to go on shoppin' trips wit' Kitty and wonderin' while they were out, could she pick up some material for a dress.

***Sniff sniff* Do you smell that? It smells like a hint of Jott. Or maybe my Spidey-senses are just off. **

**I love your ideas as to where Remy got the kids are from. Bring me more. And keep reviewing. They're my motivation. And they're really nice. **

**I decided (with the help of Where the plum tree lies) that Remy should address another child by name besides Amy. So that's how Scott came to be. I hope you all like him. Clearly, Mr. LeBeau does not. Gosh, I wonder why?**

**NEXT CHAPTER: Rogue works on her powers, makes a dress, Mystique acts like a chienne* (thanks for that one Raven34link) and yes, we add more items to the list. Until then...**

**-M.A.**


	7. But Her Mama Wouldn' Let Her Go

**Chapter seven, say hello to the readers. Readers, this is chapter seven. I hope you get along. Ace of Cyberspace, thank you for the reccomendation. Trudy, I sure do hope that you like it. Indy, I love you. You're absolutely fabulous. **

**Chapter Seven: But Her Mama Wouldn' Let Her Go**

Right after Scott—the messenger, not you, kid—left, the girls went straight to work. Rogue was put to work extra hard every day leadin' up to the ball. She didn' have to focus so much on her chores 'round her house. Instead, Mystique wanted her to work extra hard on makin' Jean and Kitty pretty 'nough to win the prince's heart.

She had to help the girls find dresses, and that won' no easy task. They tried on a buncha them—women tend to do that—and were quite indecisive 'bout which one they wanted to be. Women tend to do that, too.

No offense, ladies. S'not a bad thing. A tad annoyin' but it is what it is and Remy has come to accept it. And boys, y'all better start gettin' used to it, too. It's not really relevant now. The girls are young. They pull on some dress wit' some skinny cartoon character on it, put their hair into pigtails and call it a day. But when they get older, all the sudden it gets way more complex.

Makeup, flat irons, and items they wear under their clothes that are very deceptive.

But that's jus' a 'nother one of those things you'll realize wit' age and you gonna think back on this day and 'member ol' Remy and think: That tall, handsome Cajun sure was right.

I'm always right 'bout things like this.

But wasn' I s'posed to be tellin' y'all a story? Where was I? Dang it—I mean dammit. I mean dang it—I forgot. Amy, what was I sayin'? Oh yeah.

Amy, you're gonna make some boy very lucky one day. _Scott_, maybe you outta take note of that 'fore it's too late.

No, Amy don' have cooties. No, Amy, _Scott_ don' have cooties either. What do you mean how do I know? 'Cause I'm a grown up. Besides, they cured cooties 'bout seven years ago. You know how y'all gotta go the doctor and he starts pokin' and proddin' you wit' all sorts of needles? Well one of them needles is for cooties.

Yes, really. Why would Remy lie to you? Do I seem like the lyin' type to y'all? Uh…actually, I don' want you to answer that question. Let's jus' get back to the story.

Rogue went on more trips to the market than she could count. She hauled all sorts of dresses 'round for her sisters. And after they finally managed to settle on an outfit, she had to go home and help them get ready.

She would paint their finger and toe nails. She would fashion their hair 'til they found a fashion they liked. After that, Rogue had to 'member which style they liked the most. Then she helped her sisters get into their dresses and figure out how they had to be adjusted. Then she helped them outta their dresses and started sewin' 'em up so that they fit them jus' right.

Rogue worked very hard every day leadin' up to the ball.

She didn' have a moment for herself 'til she went upstairs late at night. When she got up to her room, she would pull off the black gloves she wore durin' the day and start workin' on controlin' them powers of hers. She was workin' harder than ever. She wanted to have them controlled by the time she went to the ball. That way, she didn' have to wear gloves and could dance wit' the prince.

She didn' know the man she saw in the market that day was the prince. She jus' wanted to dance wit' the prince because she thought it'd be nice to be able to touch someone on such a nice night an' not worry 'bout sendin' them into a coma for three weeks. So Rogue worked on controllin' her powers harder than she ever had tried in her whole life. And somehow, in between doin' all of that other stuff, she worked on a dress for herself.

She didn' have the money to buy one like Kitty and Jean and Mystique wouldn' lend her any. So Rogue had to make one herself. Now, Remy don' know from personal experience how hard it is to make a dress but I'm gonna go 'head and assume it ain't no easy task.

That Roguearella was a busy girl.

Meanwhile, back at the Quarter, Remy was gettin' ready for his big party. Everyone was losin' their minds tryin' to set up for it. There was a lotta food to make and decorations to put up. It won' no easy task. But Remy wasn' able to help out very much.

No. Not cause he was lazy. The prince was very nice and woulda been more than happy to help out but he had a bigger problem to deal wit'.

Belladonna.

She won' none too pleased to find out that her potential husband was tryin' to find a girl to replace her. So she came to the Quarter to bother him nonstop.

What? What did you say? Very good! _Merde_, indeed. Gosh, you even pronounced it right.

Remy is real proud of you right now.

Oh. But don' swear. Don' do that. It's bad. And don' steal. That's bad too. Jus' not as bad as swearin'. But you shouldn' do either. But mostly the swearin' one. That don' mean you can steal it jus' means…uh…

Remy started to confuse himself. How 'bout you kids jus' be good little chil'ren for you mamas and papas, eh? There we go.

See, Belladonna liked Remy not only 'cause he was a prince but 'cause he was jus' so dang—I mean damn. I mean dang. Dammit! I mean dang it! Don' swear, kids. He was very attractive. The most attractive male on the face of the earth. Not only the earth, but the whole universe too.

You really couldn' blame Belladonna for bein' completely crazy for the prince. Still. That ain't no excuse for bein' jus' completely crazy. Which she was.

Stupid diet sodas…that vase was very expensive…

Hmm? What? Oh. Sorry. Got caught up in a memory.

So as much as Prince Remy would have liked to help out wit' the party, he couldn'. He was too busy hidin' from Belladonna. The worse news was that the crazy lady planned on showin' up at the ball to scare away any of the girls who wanted to marry Remy.

It was a stressful time for both Rogue and Remy.

But they both got through it. The night of the ball, Remy had the Quarter all set up. It looked grand and was ready to house every single lady in Nawlins. And Rogue had made her two sisters look absolutely stunnin'—though not nearly as gorgeous as she was naturally. She helped Kitty into a pretty purple dress and Jean wore a pale pink dress.

After Rogue got her sisters ready, she ran upstairs to put on her own dress. She made one that was a dark purple and fell off hers shoulders jus' a little. She was kinda sad 'casue she hadn' gotten control of her powers yet. But she pulled on a pair of dark gloves and rushed downstairs jus' as the carriage that would take them to the Quarter arrived.

Mystique, though, she took one look at Rogue and wasn' very pleased. She asked Rogue what did she think she was doin'.

"I'm goin' to the ball."

Mystique shook her head. "No, you aren't."

Rogue's jaw pretty much dropped to the floor. But here's the difference between my version of Cinderella and that one that Disney made: Rogue didn' get all sad and start beggin' and pleadin' to go. Instead, she crossed her arms in front of her and demanded not so nicely to know why couldn' she go.

"Because you aren' fit to be in the same room as royalty."

"Oh, and you are?"

That kids, is what we call an "oh, snap" moment. Mystique got real angry when Rogue said that. They started fightin'.

"I've been workin' my butt off for the past several years and I was the one who got those two ready for the ball and now I can't go?"

Mystique nodded.

"Mom…maybe we should let her go," Jean said, lookin' in between the two women. Kitty was too busy tryin' to get out the house to try and help her sister.

"Keep out of this, Jean."

Jean frowned but closed her mouth.

Mystique and Rogue kept on fightin'. Rogue then pointed out that she made her own dress and that it wouldn' cost Mystique anythin' for her to go and that the invitation said that all the girls were invited.

Mystique looked her step daughter up and down for a very long moment. Then, all the sudden, she grabbed the top of Rogue's dress and tore it 'fore Rogue knew what was happenin'. Then Mystique went crazy. Wit' her bare hands, she tore the dress up 'til Rogue couldn' possibly wear it in public.

Don' be sad, kiddes. 'Member: a happy endin' is jus' 'round the corner.

But Rogue still had a ways to go 'fore she got to her happy endin'. Standin' there, she looked down at her shredded dress. She felt angry that Mystique was so cruel to her and she felt sad that Mystique didn' seem to love her. Rogue was mad enough to punch her step mama but she didn'. She was also sad enough to cry.

Jean looked pretty sad for her sister. Jean, she won' so bad. Jus' a goody-goody. She started to say somethin' to Rogue but Mystique stopped her. She told her daughters to go get in the carriage.

Rogue and Mystique stared at each other for a real long time. Finally, Rogue ran upstairs. Only when she got up there did she start cryin'. She didn' want Mystique to see how bad she had been hurt.

'Member that kids. Sometimes, people are gonna hurt you. But you can' let 'em see how bad. Don' give 'em the satisfaction.

Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, learn French, don' hit a man in that one spot, don' always trust a pretty face, don' let the ones who hurt you have the satisfaction of seein' you upset, and somethin' about rats and birds.

What? Are you kiddin' me? Fine, fine fine.

Does anyone _else _need a potty break besides _Scott? _All y'all?

Fine. But hurry back.

**Potty break time!**

**Thank you for reading. Keep submitting your ideas and I'll keep on submitting chapters. Once again, I can't thank you enough for the reviews. They make me smile.**

**NEXT CHAPTER: Rogue's fairy god person makes things better and more items get added to our growing list. (just for the record, I'm VERY excited for chapter eight. I've got a surprise for all of you...)**

**-M.A.**


	8. So A Fairy Came To Help The Girl

**This chapter might be my favorite thus far. It made me smile while I was typing it. So I hope that means you guys like it as much. Indy, I LOVE you're most recent guess at W.R.G.T.K.. BlueFox, I also picked up a lotta French via Romy/X-Men comics staring Remy LeBeau. Everyone else, your reviews fuel me! Don't stop! And keep guessing where the kids came from. But now, you must be wondering who the fairy god person is. So, I proudly present chapter eight.**

**Chapter Eight: So A Fairy Came To Help The Girl**

Is everyone back from the potty break?

_Un, deux, trois…neuf…douze…treize…_Yup. That's all of you. We ready to get back to the story then? Good. So where was I?

Oh, yeah, Mystique was actin' like a _chienne_. Hmm? What's that? Um…you don' need to know what that word means. Jus' trust Remy, it ain't very nice. I'm allowed to say those sorta words cause I'm a grown up.

What kinda question is that? Um…when you're old 'nough to go to Mardi Gras is when you're old 'nough to say those words. In French. You still ain't 'llowed to say it in English. Ever.

Ain't I s'posed to be tellin' y'all a story? It was jus' gettin' good. Don' you wanna know what's gonna happen to Roguearella? Huh? It doesn' matter that you already know the story. You don' know the Remy LeBeau version of the story. And that version is much better. Haven' we already been over this already?

What? My last name ain't funny soundin'. It's French. No, it ain't a bad word. It's jus' French.

It's not a funny name. Haven' we already done this song and dance? No.

Not a _literal _song and dance. It's jus' an expression. Geez.

Look, let's get back to the story.

Rogue had run upstairs in her tattered dress, cryin' and angry. She watched from her bedroom window while her family rode 'way to the ball that she couldn' go to. Some more tears rolled down her cheeks. Then, 'cause Rogue ain't no cry baby, she yelled a bad word—in English—and punched her wall. It left a big ol' hole in it 'cause like I said 'fore, Rogue ain't no whimp. She looked at the hole for a minute then remembered that she'd have to be the one to fix it later.

So she punched it again, jus' for the-err, heck of it.

She was startin' to get all caught up in her anger. And kiddies, it's never good, no matter how mad you are and how bad it is, don' let your anger consume you. Is it jus' me or should we add this to our little list?

Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, learn French, don' hit a man in that one spot, don' always trust a pretty face, don' let the ones who hurt you have the satisfaction of seein' you upset, don' let your anger consume you, and somethin' about rats and birds.

Remy really wishes he could 'member what the last one was 'bout…Oh well.

Rogue was so caught up in her anger, she didn' notice somethin' odd happenin' in her room. Pink dust materialized in her room. Rogue turned 'round and finally noticed the pink stuff..

In a fog of glittery pink powder appeared a man. He was big, muscular, angry lookin', and didn' smell so nice. He was frownin' and didn' look like he was a nice fella. He was also wearin' a sparkly, bedazzled bubblegum pink leotard wit' a matchin' tutu.

Hehehe.

Rogue looked frightened. Not jus' 'cause some man jus' appeared outta nowhere but 'cause he didn' look very good in his tutu. The leotard…bulged in certain places. It was more than anyone really outta see.

"Who…are you?" she asked, 'bout ready to drain him wit' her powers.

The man grunted. "I'm Wolverine. You're fairy godfather."

"Those exist?"

"No, I just wear the tutu for fun."

Hehehe. Remy amuses himself….But anyway.

Rogue asked Wolverine what he was doin' there. Wolverine 'spalined that, as her fairy godfather, he was lookin' out for he. He saw how mean Mystique was to her and he was there to help her out. Rogue then asked Wolvie why he hadn' helped her out almost ten years ago when she started her servitude.

"I'm here now," he growled. "Take it or leave it. Bub."

Rogue shrugged. Beggars can't be choosers, kiddos.

Rogue asked Wolvie how he was gonna help her.

"I can do anything for you with my magical testosterone powers."

"Testosterone powers?"

"It's somethin' I'm full of."

'Fore Rogue could ask any more questions, Wolvie waved his hands. Rogue was lost in a fog the same pink dust the Wolverine appeared in. When the fog disappeared, she was standin' there in a brand now dress that was ten times better than the one Mystique ruined.

It was emerald that…flattered all of her…features. Flattered them quite nicely, actually. Especially in the bodice area. That area was _very_ flattered. Her hair was pinned up wit' her white bangs in her face.

Kids, Rogue was more beautiful than I can ever begin to say. She was my…I mean…she was any man's dream come true.

…but mine 'specially.

She was stunned at how impressive Wolvie's pink, testosterone powers were. The one thing she couldn' help but notice was that the dress's sleeves fell off her shoulders and didn' have sleeves.

"What 'bout my arms?" she asked the fairy. Hehehe.

Sorry. The image tickles Remy, is all.

Anyway, Wolvie jus' looked at where Rogue hid her mama's pretty white gloves. Suddenly, she understood. So Rogue pulled out the gloves that were white as snow and soft as silk and pulled them on. They came up to her elbows and covered enough of her arms to keep her and everyone else safe.

Wit' the gloves, Rogue was…well…she was a vision straight outta a fairy tale.

As happy as she was, she knew somethin' was missin'.

"How the heck am I s'posed to get there?"

Wolvie grunted again—he tends to do that a lot—and looked 'round her room. He spotted a blue, fuzzy mouse runnin' 'cross the floor. Wit' reflexes that were freakishly fast, he picked the mouse up by the tail.

"Use this," he told Rogue.

She asked in a not so nice way exactly how she was s'posed to use a mouse to get to the ball. Wolvie said a word that was equally not nice and waved his hand again. Wit' the help of his magic testosterone powers, he turned the furry blue mouse into a furry blue boy wit' a long tail.

Why was he blue? 'Cause he didn' eat his vegetables. So unless you wanna be blue and furry—some of you weird kids might want to—eat your vegetables.

"This is Kurt," Wolvie 'splained. "He'll take you wherever you need to go."

Rogue smiled. Her fairy godfather had really come through for her. So Rogue took hold of Kurt's hand and started to poof away to the ball.

"One thing," Wolvie said. "My powers don' work at midnight. So you gotta be home before that."

"What kinda fairy has powers that don' work past a certain time?"

"The fairy that is gettin' your sorry butt to the ball. Now get outta here and get to the ball. Be home before midnight."

Rogue started to leave but Wolvie stopped her again.

"Have fun stripes," he said before he disappeared into a cloud of pink glitter.

**Surprise! Logan is our fairy god person. **

**Where the plum trees lie, looks like you owe me a buncha Monopoly money. And you know, it's funny that you mention Monopoly...hehehe. Don't worry. That'll make sense in a couple of chapters. But until then...**

**NEXT CHAPTER: There's romance, blah, blah, blah, an exchange of gifts, blah, blah, blah, the clock strikes, and yes, we add even more items to the list.**

**Goodnight my lovely readers.**

**-M.A.**


	9. And She Went To The Party and Danced

**Yay! Chapter nine and it's pretty darn long. **

** I was happy to see y'all really liked the brief appearance of Rogue's fairy godfather. But now it's time for it to really get good. Where the plum tree lies, I'm glad you liked my little Fairy-Wolverine present. Chellerbelle, thank you for the reviews. Actually, thanks to everyone who reviewed. You know I love you. You're the reason I keep writing.**

**But enough about that. You wanna get to the good stuff...**

**Chapter Nine: And She Went To The Party And Danced **

In one poof, Rogue and Kurt disappeared from outta the room. It seemed like only a second had passed. In the time it took for Rogue to blink, she was outta her room. When she opened her eyes back up, she felt chilly. She looked 'round and saw that she was standin' right outside the French Quarter. She could her people inside talkin'. Girls in fancy dresses walked past Rogue and Kurt wit'out seemin' to notice them. Jazz music from inside the Quarter poured out.

"Wow," Rogue said. She couldn' believe she was already at the ball when things were lookin' so low for her. She smiled at the blue fuzzy boy. "Thank you so much."

Kurt told her not to worry 'bout it. He told Rogue he would be waitin' for her at a nearby tree. He reminded her to be back at midnight and Rogue promised she would. Then she looked at the big ol' Quarter.

A group of gigglin' girls passed by her. One of them kinda reminded her of Kitty and she panicked. She had forgotten all 'bout her family and had to 'member to evade them.

Evade means to avoid. Expand your vocabulary, kids.

After starin' at the Quarter wit' her mouth agape—she sorta looked a fish. A very pretty fish—for a real long time she finally closed it and walked inside. When she stepped in the door, she noticed that while everyone else was headed toward the main room, there was one room standin' off to the side. She had a drink in her hand and looked mad 'nough to spit fire.

Can anyone guess who that woman was?

What? No. _Scott_, why would you even think that? What kinda stupid guess is that? Does anyone _else _have a guess?

Thank you, Amy. It was Belladonna.

Like Remy said 'fore, Belladonna was pretty and all but battier than a fruitcake. And trust ol' Remy, them fruitcakes are pretty darn batty.

Belladonna was there glarin' at every girl who walked in the room, scoutin' out any possible competition. Rogue took note of the glarin' woman.

Do any of you kids have a doggy? Oh, good, a lotta y'all do. So then you know how two doggies look when they pass each other but don' like each other.

That's the kinda look Rogue and Belladonna exchanged. Neither girl said anythin' to each other though. Rogue kept walkin' and Bella kept on glrarin'.

Inside, Remy was busy dancin' wit' every girl in Nawlins. What seemed like a good idea turned out to be pretty annoyin' 'cause there were quite a few girls. Some of them were pretty crazy too. Not Belladonna crazy but they were 'bout two shrimps short of a gumbo.

Gumbo? You don' know what gumbo is?

Well butter Remy's behind and call him a biscuit. Wait, I don' actually want you to call me a biscuit. But I'm jus' shocked not one of y'all ever had gumbo. What y'all need to do is go home and ask your mama and papa to make you some. Oh, but add a lotta hot sauce. And Cheyenne pepper.

You can't forget the Cheyenne pepper. Trust me: everythin' is better wit' Cheyenne pepper. It might take some time for your taste buds to grow back but it'll be worth it in the end.

Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, learn French, don' hit a man in that one spot, don' always trust a pretty face, don' let the ones who hurt you have the satisfaction of seein' you upset, don' let your anger consume you, everythin' is better wit' Cheyenne pepper, and somethin' about rats and birds.

I really wish I could 'member what the last one was 'bout.

What was I sayin'? Somethin' 'bout…

Oh yeah. The prince. He was dancin' wit' a girl. She had short blonde hair and was a little too loud for polite company. Her name was Tabby and when she was dancin' wit' Remy, her hands got a little too…comfortable and startin' wanderin' 'round his body in a way that won' very appropriate. He tried to ignore it but Tabby won' very tactful.

"Man, this place is so frickin' nice," Tabby said, lookin' 'round the room.

Prince Remy jus' nodded his head and wondered how much longer he would have to dance wit' her. She then started askin' him a buncha other questions, like what the most expensive thing in the room was, where the prince's bedroom was, and how often did he work out.

Now don' even start to ask why Tabby wanted to know the last two things. It's jus' one of those things you're too young to know 'bout. If you're that curious 'bout it, ask your pa'ents.** I ain't here to tell you that story.

Your pants?

No. Your pa'ents. Pay-ents. Ugh. Your mama and your papa.**

As Remy and Tabby were twirlin' and dancin', he noticed Rogue from all the way 'cross the room. She was real far 'way but Remy could see how pretty she looked in her jade—that's a 'nother way to see green—dress and her white gloves.

The graceful, smooth prince stumbled over his own two feet when he saw Rogue. Tabby asked him what was wrong.

"I've…gotta go," Remy told her.

Tabby didn' seem to mind.

"See-ya."

Then she slapped him on the behind—somethin' Remy won' very pleased 'bout—and walked off. He mighta taken time to be mad if he weren' so busy starin' at Rogue.

He didn' know it was the girl from the market a few weeks before. He thought she looked kinda familiar but he was seein' her hair for the first time and it threw him off. Plus, he was kinda busy tryin' to make sure his eyes didn' jus' pop outta his head from starin' at her.

Not. Not _literally_. Geez. I'd have thought y'all woulda figured that out forever ago.

Rogue was eyeballin' the table wit' all the foods and stuff on it. She didn' see Remy comin'. So he jus' walked right up to her and smiled his most handsome smile. And when Remy gave his most handsome smile—one he called The Smolder—no girl could resist him.

But he s'posed Rogue didn' get the memo 'cause she jus' rolled her eyes when she finally looked at him. But that Remy, he was a persistent fellow.

"Hi."

"What do you want?" Rogue asked, pickin' up a little plate and puttin' a sandwich on it.

"Well…I was jus' wonderin' if you wanted to dance."

"Nope."

He frowned a little 'cause Rogue seemed like she couldn' have cared less. But Remy tried again.

"You know, this is _my_ party you're at, right?"

She gave him a look that wasn' very nice. "This is your party?"

He bowed lavishly, givin' her a 'nother one of his devilish smiles. "Prince Remy LeBeau at your service, _Cherie_."

She paused. When he called her that, she kinda sorta 'membered how the man from market called her that but she couldn' recall it completely. Instead, she jus' stuck to bein' snartky and said:

"Well, that's good for you."

"Why you bein' so mean, _chere_?"

"Why you bein' so annoyin', Swamp Rat?"

The prince paused. The name also sounded vaguely familiar to Remy but he couldn' quiet 'member why.

"I jus' wanna dance. Com'on. I don' bite." Then Remy winked at her. "'Less you want me to, that is."

Rogue started to say somethin'—probably nothin' very nice—bur Remy decided he outta interrupt Rogue 'fore she yelled at him.

"I could jus' have you tossed out this party."

Her eyebrows went straight into her hairline. "You would have me thrown out just 'cause I don't wanna dance with you?"

"Yup."

"Is that your way of charmin' a girl?"

Remy stuck out his arm. "It worked, didn' it?" Rogue growled but stuck her hand on his offered arm. "'Sides, I got the good looks to charm the ladies. I don' need words. Though I have those, too."

"You're cocky."

"After the party, you wanna find out jus' how _cocky_ I am?"

She tried to look angry but an itty bitty smile slipped through. So Remy led her out onto the dance floor and started dancin' wit' her. Rogue was a little awkward but the prince was so good of a dancer, it made up for her lack of skill.

"You look real pretty tonight," Remy told Rogue 'cause it was true.

"Bite me."

"No. Really. You look real pretty."

She blushed at his nice words. "Shut up."

He jus' smiled and kept on talkin'. That's Remy for you, a real talker. "I bet you look pretty even when you aren' all dressed up for a ball."

"Shut up."

"I bet you look pretty even if you were covered in dirt."

"Shut up," she told him, 'cause her blush was gettin' real red.

"I bet you look pretty even if you were covered in manure."

"Shut—"

"But I might not have asked you to dance 'cause you'd have smelled funny. And it doesn' matter how pretty you are, I wouldn' dance wit' a girl who smells like—"

Rogue started laughin' 'fore he could finish talkin'. He laughed wit' her 'cause her laugh spread like the cootie virus before the vaccine and it made him wanna laugh. So they laughed a little bit and then they laughed a little bit more. And then the song was over and so they decided they would dance a little bit more so they could find more stuff to laugh at.

They didn' really notice it, but they danced for a real long time. Belladonna was watchin' the whole time and was lookin' forward to gettin' her crazy little hands on Rogue. Or Remy. Or both.

Preferably both.

But she didn' get the chance to do anyone any bodily harm anytime soon. 'Cause after a buncha dances, Rogue and Remy noticed their feet started achin'.

"You wanna take this outside, _Cherie_?"

Rogue didn' get angry when Remy called her that. She was startin' to like it actually. But she didn' wanna tell him that so she jus' nodded. He took hold of her gloved hand and led her outta the Quarter to the garden.

It was quieter there. More romantic. And the stars were all bright and shiny and makin' Rogue look real pretty in the natural light. Remy knew jus' lookin' at her face that she was the girl for him. He wouldn' have to marry Belladonna 'cause he was in love wit' Rogue. He jus' knew it.

"Those gloves are very pretty," he told Rogue, runnin' his fingers up and down her arm.

"Thank you."

They talked for a little bit longer. Rogue liked talkin' to Remy 'cause he didn' know that she was jus' a maid who couldn' control her powers. He jus' seemed to like her for bein' her sarcastic but secretly sweet self. And she liked him 'cause he was almost as witty as she was and was funny and handsome and not as bad as he seemed and handsome.

I said handsome twice? Really?

Well, it's somethin' worth repeatin'. Trust me.

Remy liked Rogue 'cause wit' every other girl, they only seemed to want him 'cause he was an attractive prince. He had to be polite and formal wit' them. He didn' have to wit' Rogue. She actually seemed to like him for his brazen behavior and dirty jokes. He liked for bein' liked by himself. And he liked that Rogue wasn' no frilly maiden who needed a prince to save her.

He had a good idea that Rogue could fight her way through jus' 'bout anythin'.

So Remy leaned down to give her a kiss. But Rogue quickly moved away from him. If he kissed her, her powers would work and then she would hurt the prince. And she didn' want him to be hurt. So she moved away.

"Um…no kissin'," Rogue told him.

"Why?"

"Cause."

"Cause why?"

"Just cause."

"But I wanna give you a kiss."

"How 'bout you give me somethin' else instead?"

There were a lotta things Remy coulda said—mosta them not so appropriate. Instead, he jus' went into his pocket and pulled out an old, tattered card.

"How 'bout I give you this?"

Rogue took the card and looked at it oddly. "Queen of Hearts."

"My lucky lady. She's gotten me out of a whole load of jams."

"Then I need a deck of those."

"I want you to have it."

"Why?"

"Cause?"

"Cause why?"

Remy took hold of Rogue's hand. He held it real tight and suddenly both of them knew at the same time that neither one of them wanted Remy to ever let go.

"Jus'…cause."

Have y'all seen one of those "mushy" movies where the two characters turn toward each other in slow motion and pretty music plays in the background and it's all happy?

This was one of those moments. It'd have been perfect.

'Cept it was ruined 'cause the clock struck midnight.

**Moment ruined! **

**Sorry. But it couldn't be that easy for them. I also have to apologize about the lack of interaction between Remy and the mysterious kids in this chapter but I really wanted to focus more on all the fun Romy-ness happening. But I promise, I won't neglect them as much next chapter. Until then, please send me your WONDERFUL ideas and WONDERFUL reviews.**

****Not an exact quote, but a quote from Ultimate X-Men, the issue where Remy takes in an orphan. It was part of my inspiration for this story. **

**NEXT CHAPTER: The clock strikes midnight, Rogue loses her "glass slipper", and Belladonna get's what's comin' to her. **

**-M.A.**


	10. But Then The Clock Struck Midnight

**CHAPTER TEN! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S ALREADY HERE! AND I HAVE ALMOST FIFTY REVIEWS! AWESOMENESS!**

**BlueFox, I have read the original fairy tale but I don't plan on being that cruel to Belladonna. Ace of Cyberspace, once again, thank you. Indy, you caught me. I'm a Tangled fanatic (partly because Flynn Rider reminds me of the Disney version of Gambit. Think 'bout it). aecul and Wisteria, thank y'all for being fabulous in general. All of the reviews keep me going. You're all just so dang awesome. Which is why I proudly present...**

**Chapter Ten: But Then The Clock Struck Midnight**

Rogue and Remy both looked up at the clock. Rogue looked worried but Remy looked completely at ease.

"Heh. It's midnight," Remy said, still holdin' onto Rogue's hand.

The clock struck again and Rogue jumped up to her feet. "I gotta get outta here."

Remy didn' believe her at all so he jus' threw his head back and laughed. "That's funny."

"I'm serious. I gotta go, Remy."

That wiped the smile right offa his face real quick. Remy stood up to, his hold on Rogue's fingers gettin' tighter. "You can't go."

"I have to."

She tried to run away but he didn' let go of her hand. She couldn' go jus' yet. He still hadn' proposed or planned the weddin' or—more importantly—the honeymoon. He had so much he wanted to say to her but now all the sudden Rogue wanted to run away. She can't go.

"You can't go," Remy told her.

"Please, just let me go."

"But..but..but…."

Stop laughin'. He ain't talkin' 'bout that kinda butt. 'Sides. You shouldn' laugh at poor Prince Remy. He had silver tongue all his life and now all the sudden he couldn' find words when he really needed them the most. So I don' care how many times I "but" you keep your little tushies shut and feel sympathy for the drop dead gorgeous prince.

No, silver tongue don' mean that they gotta tongue made outta silver. No, that wouldn' be "cool". It'd probably make eatin' real hard and I bet it ain't to comfortable neither. Why, I bet if a person who had a silver tongue probably don' got any teeth 'cause they knocked them all out wit' their impractical tongue. What's that?

Impractical means it don' make much sense. Like Belladonna. She's impractical.

…among other things. But mostly impractical.

"I gotta go."

She turned 'round to leave but she was only able to take a couple of steps 'fore she had to stop. Remy wouldn' let go of her hand and she couldn' get away from him. He kept askin' her to stay but she kept tellin' him she had to go and kept on tryin' to take her hand back.

"I've gotta go, Remy."

Wit' dat, she pulled her arm one good time. But she pulled and the prince didn' let go. When she got her hand free, he was still holdin' jus' one of her pretty white gloves. She wanted to get it back but she didn' have time. So she jus' ran as fast as her feet would carry her away outta the garden and back to where Kurt was waitin'.

Remy tried to chase her but tried to follow her but there were too many people and she got lost in the crowds. All he had left was her white glove. He realized that in the whole "I'm in love wit' her process", he never even got her name.

It wasn' very bright of him, now was it? _Non_, it wasn'.

Rogue was halfway out the door someone grabbed her by the arm—the gloved one—and spun her 'round. Belladonna was standin' there, lookin' murderously angry.

"Get out my way," Rogue hissed, aware of the time.

"We gotta talk."

"Move."

"You keep your hands off of Remy—"

"Get out of my way."

"—else you gonna havta deal wit' me."

"Move, _chienne_, get out the way."

"I ain't done wit' you—"

"Get out the way, _chienne_!" Rogue won' gonna say nothin' again. So she pulled her gloved fist way back and punched Belladonna square in the nose. "Move."

When she punched her, Bella's face made a satisfyin'…I mean unpleasant crackin' noise. The blonde screeched like a crazy animal, holdin' her face. Some blood ran out 'tween her fingers and down her face and onto her dress.

"Ah hink you bwoke mey noose you witch!" Belladonna yelled, only some of her words were all funny soundin' 'cause she couldn' talk right 'cause of her nose. Not all the words sounded like they s'posed to. Do you get Remy's drift? You don'?

That's probably for the best anyway.

But Roguearella? She didn' have time to worry 'bout the bleedin' blonde in front of her. She jus' kept on walkin, her fist hurtin' from the hard punch she gave Bella.

Violence is bad, kiddos. You should only do it when it's necessary. But it never should be necessary. But sometimes it is. So make it your last resort. But don' let no one pick and beat up on you, either. Stand up for yourself. Don' take anyone else's…crap. But don' be violent. Unless you have to. Which you shouldn'.

But you might.

Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, learn French, don' hit a man in that one spot, don' always trust a pretty face, don' let the ones who hurt you have the satisfaction of seein' you upset, don' let your anger consume you, everythin' is better wit' Cheyenne pepper, violence is not the answer but sometimes it's the only solution, and somethin' about rats and birds.

So don' hit people. Unless you gotta hit them it's okay. But even then you shouldn' do it.

Do you understand what Remy means?

You don'? That's okay. It'll make sense one day. Jus' like all that other stuff I told you.

Dang it!

Hey, I didn' swear in front of you this time. Remy did good. 'Cept now I don' 'member what I was gonna say…Dammit.

Dammit! I mean, dang it! I'm swearin' again. Don' swear kids. Remy is a bad guy. Don' listen to him.

'Cept for all that other stuff I said. And the list. But other than that, don' listen to me. Oh, but listen to me finish my story. You should listen to that, too.

Rogue ran away from the bleedin' Bella and to the doors. But on her way out, a flash of red and pink caught her eye. Even though she could feel the testosterone magic wearin' off—_literally_ this time—she stopped. And her mouth dropped open.

"Jean?" she said, shocked. Cause her sister was hidin' in a corner of the hall kissin' the messenger boy Scott from before. She couldn' believe what she saw because Jean's hand was on his…well, Scott he…uh…

They were kissin'. End of story.

Jean turned her head and looked at her sister who was missin' one glove and had a pretty dress that seemed to be dissolvin' 'fore her very eyes. They both jus' stared at each other for a minute.

"What are you doing here?" Jean asked, but not in a mean way. More of n a surprised way.

"What are you doin'?" Rogue asked her right back.

'Fore Jeannie could answer, the clock chimed again. Rogue's fancy shoes disappeared and were replaced wit' the raggedy flats she wore at home. She didn' wait for Jean's answer, she jus' ran away. Jean called after her as Rogue ran away, but Rogue didn' turn 'round. She ran back to where Kurt was waitin' for her. She threw herself in his arms.

"Take us home!" she hollered.

One thing good 'bout Kurt was that he didn' need to be told twice. He jus' ported them away from the French Quarter. Rogue closed her eyes to blink. When she opened them back up, she was standin' in her room again. As the clock continued to chime, she got to watch her dress slowly dissolve into a pink haze and become the old tattered one that Mystique had ruined.

She looked at where Kurt was standin' but all she saw was a mouse runnin' by her feet and under her bed real quick.

And jus' like that kiddies, her magical night was over. And all she had left was a mouse under her bed, one glove, and an ol' Queen of Hearts card. She sighed, feelin' real sad all the sudden.

What did you say Amy? Oh, yeah! Kill rats and throw rocks at birds! That's what that item on the list was! Thank you, _chere_. I really appreciate you remindin' me. But, for the record, the mouse version of Kurt is the exception to that rule, kay?

Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, learn French, don' hit a man in that one spot, don' always trust a pretty face, don' let the ones who hurt you have the satisfaction of seein' you upset, don' let your anger consume you, everythin' is better wit' Cheyenne pepper, violence is not the answer but sometimes it's the only solution, and kill rats and birds 'cept for blue fuzzy ones named Kurt.

But where was Remy? Oh. Back the Quarter.

At the Quarter, Prince Remy had found Belladonna on the floor, bleedin' and swearin' to the point where she could put any ol' Frenchman to shame. He helped her up 'cause he was a prince and that was the polite thing to do. But mostly 'cause he didn' like her gettin' blood all over his floors. He tried not to laugh at her face as he was takin' her to the nurse.

He was right when he thought that Rogue could handle herself jus' fine.

After he got rid of Belladonna, he went back out the garden to think a little bit. He pulled out Rogue's white glove from his pocket. She was gone and he didn' have her name. But he had her glove. That was all he needed.

Cause Remy LeBeau was gonna find that girl and he was gonna marry her.

What, _Scott_? Geez, you gotta be kiddin' me, boy.

_Yes_, the glove is my version of the glass slipper. Am I gonna have to add somethin' to the list 'bout not askin' stupid questions?

**Wow. The story is getting close to being over. **

**Did anyone catch the song lyrics in this chapter...*snicker* Don't have much to say besides the usual praise for your ideas and reviews. I'm thinking about, after the story is over, adding an "alternate ending" chapter where I incorporate one or two of my favorites. But no promises. I'm also surprised no one has asked what I was so pleased about a few chapters ago when I mentioned Monopoly. Oh well. You'll figure it out soon enough. And I'm going to enjoy that part *snicker* **

**Heh. Guess I did have a lot to say after all.**

**NEXT CHAPTER: Remy searches for Rogue, Mystique acts like "that word" and, once again, we add more stuff to our growling list. Unitl then, goodnight everyone!**

**-M.A.**


	11. So the Prince Looked For The Girl

**Hi! **

**DarkLatinAngel, thank you for ALL the reviews (and yes, chienne means "bitch"). Little girl at story time, that had to have been one of the funniest reviews I have ever read. Everyone else, you should read it. It's just spectacular. And even a little...inspirational *gasp* What do I mean? I suppose y'all will have to wait to find out. And as for the mystery song lyrics:**

**"Move, chienne. Get out the way. Get out the way, chienne."**

**That song only makes since if you translate "chienne" and are familiar with a certain song by Ludacris. If not, you aren't missing much. But anyway, thank for all the reviews. Keep submitting. Much love.**

**Chapter Elven: So The Prince Looked For The Girl**

The day after the ball, Rogue went downstairs really nervously. She hadn' gotten caught last night 'cause she beat her family home but she was real worried 'bout Jean. So when she went into the kitchen to start breakfast and saw Jean in there waitin' for her, Rogue did the first thing that came to her mind.

She pulled off her glove and touched her sister's cheek. When she did that, Jean took a nice little nap.

We'll get back to those two in a minute. But right now, I bet y'all are wonderin' 'bout what Remy's up to. No, not me Remy. The Prince Remy. There's a difference. Well, sorta.

But anyway, the day after the ball Mattie and Charlie called a meetin' wit' Remy. He went to meet up wit' them and asked what they wanted. But he asked nicely 'cause if he were rude, Mattie woulda had a fit that would frighten any man right outta his skin.

No. Not _literally_.

So Prince Remy asked what they wanted to see him for and his parents asked him if he had met a girl that he liked very much the night 'fore. Remy said that he did. They asked him if he met a girl he loved. Remy said he did.

"Where is she?" his mama asked.

"Well…."

"What's she like?" his papa asked.

"Well, she's…."

"What's her name?"

"'Bout that…."

They asked the prince what was wrong and Remy told them how everythin' was goin' perfect 'tween him and the girl when all of the sudden she jus' ran out the door. Then he blushed 'cause he had to tell them that in the several hours that he and Rogue were together, he not once asked her what her name was.

Mattie and Charlie frowned at that. They told Remy that if he couldn' find that girl, he would have to marry Belladonna 'cause his birthday was gettin' real close now. And he had seen Belladonna at breakfast. She caught him laughin' at her under his breath while he was eatin' his breakfast cause the punch Rogue delivered to her nose left Bella all bandaged and wit' black eyes.

She threw a plate at his head. That made Remy stop laughin' real quick.

This is 'nother example of Bella bein' impractical. And a 'nother example of Bella breakin' very expensive stuff.

Stupid vase….

What's that? Ha.

No. I will not be tellin' you the backstory of Remy LeBeau and Belladonna. That's not a story kids should hear. In fact, I don' think it's a story no one should hear. Hell—I mean heck—it's not a story I wish I knew. How did I learn it in the first place?

Well, kiddos, when you get older, you get a lotta experiences. Some of them ain't so nice. Belladonna is one of those not so nice experiences. But jus' 'cause you experience it don' mean you gotta tell people 'bout it. 'Specially little ones that are far too young to hear the more…graphic details of their life.

Long story short, Remy ain' tellin' you that story. End of story.

What? No, no, no, no, no, no kiddies. Don't be ridiculous. I didn' mean the Roguearella story. I meant the Remy and Belladonna story. _That _story is over. Not this one. This one still needs a happy endin'. So let me get back to that.

Mattie and Charlie told Remy that unless he could think of somethin' creative real fast, he would havta marry Belladonna. Do you know how much he loved Rogue?

He loved her so much, he wasn' afraid of marryin' Bella. He was afraid of not bein' wit' Rogue. And if that isn' love, then I don' know what is.

'Cause Bella?

She crazy.

And lucky for Remy, he was a very creative prince. So he pulled out the white glove Rogue left behind and told his parents his plan.

Now back to Rogue and Jean.

When Jean woke up from her Rogue induced nap, she tried to stand up but found that she couldn'. She looked down and saw that she was tied to a chair in Rogue's room.

"What's going on?" Jean asked.

Rogue appeared in front of her.

She told Jean that if she told anyone 'bout how she was at the ball the night 'fore, she'll tell Mystique how Jean was touchin' the Scotty-boy inappropriately instead of tryin' to woo the prince.

Woo means to make someone fall in love wit' them.

Jean rolled her eyes and told Rogue to untie her. Rogue asked her why.

"Because I'm not going to tell on you."

"Why? 'Cause you don't want mom knowin' 'bout you and that messenger boy?"

"Geez, Roguearella, no. Because I'm glad that you went to the ball."

Rogue snorted 'cause she didn' believe Jean.

"I'm serious," Jean insisted, tryin' to get free. "Or in case you forgot, I did try to convince mom to let you go to the ball in the first place."

Rogue had forgot that. "Oh. Yeah."

"I don't care if you went to the ball. Our secret." She paused. "But I would appreciate if you don't mention seeing me and Scott to mom."

"Okay." She started to untie Jean. "Why are you bein' so nice to me?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"You're my evil step sister. You make me brush your hair all the time. You hate me…don't you?"

Jean shook her head and stood up. "What? No. I don't hate you. That's ridiculous. You're my sister. I love you." Then Jean touched her hair. "But I _do _have a lot of hair and you can't expect me to brush it all by myself."

"So…you aren't my evil step sister?"

"No. Kitty is."

Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, learn French, don' hit a man in that one spot, don' always trust a pretty face, don' let the ones who hurt you have the satisfaction of seein' you upset, don' let your anger consume you, everythin' is better wit' Cheyenne pepper, violence is not the answer but sometimes it's the only solution, kill rats and birds 'cept for blue fuzzy ones named Kurt, and Kitty is the evil step sister.

What as that, Amy?

I know said that Jean was the evil step sister but well…Remy kinda likes Jean. I know I'm s'posed to hate her and all that stuff but she ain't _that _bad. But Scott?

He's that bad.

No. Not you, _Scott_.

…but you gettin' there.

Anyway, a couple of days passed wit'out anythin' really interestin' happenin'. 'Cept Rogue really missed the prince. A lot. 'Cause she loved him a whole bunch. Not jus' 'cause he was incredibly handsome and good lookin' and rich and 'cause he could help her outta her life. She jus' liked him.

But his good looks definitely helped a little.

She never thought she'd see him again but for some reason, she kept on practicin' on her powers. There were even a couple of times where Jean let her experiment on her. Sometimes, if Rogue concentrated real hard, she could touch Jean for jus' a second or two.

She was real close kids. Real close.

One day, she was cleanin' the kitchen when there was a knock at the door. Rogue answered it and Scott was standin' there again. She asked him what he was doin' there. He explained that the prince was lookin' for a girl who disappeared durin' the ball. He said that the girl he was lookin' for had a special possession of his and one glove that he had the match to and that Remy would be at her house in two days to see if one of the girls there had it.

'Fore Rogue could get excited, Scott looked over her shoulder and asked if Jean was home. Roguearella rolled her eyes and got her sister. But as soon as she finished, she ran upstairs and screamed 'cause she was jus' so happy.

She had the glove and she had his special card.

What Rogue didn' notice was Mystique watchin' her. See, her step mama was startin' to get suspicious. She had noticed Rogue and Jean bein' real friendly to each other. She also noticed that the night they got back from the ball, Rogue wasn' actin' all angry like she shoulda been. In fact, Rogue had been actin' kinda nice.

She had bad feelin' that somethin' was goin' on.

The day Remy was travelin' through Nawlins lookin' for the girl wit' his card and the other glove, Mystique noticed Rogue finished her chores extra fast and even put on one of her nice outfits. Mystique told Rogue to go to her room and followed her up.

"Where are your mother's gloves?"

Rogue got nervous real fast. "Why?"

"Give me your mother's gloves."

"No."

"Where are they?"

"Why?"

"Give me the gloves."

Rogue didn' give her the gloves so Mystique searched her room. Rogue fought her and tried to stop her but Mystique shoved Rogue away. Rogue hit her head hard on the wall and that kinda knocked her silly for a minute. It was jus' 'nough time for Mystique though. She found the box that Rogue kept the gloves in under her bed. When she opened it, she only found one glove. Both of them stop movin' for a long moment. Suddenly, Mystique ran out the door and slammed it shut. Rogue banged on it hard and tried to get out but Mystique locked the from the outside so Rogue couldn' get out.

Wit' dat, she went downstairs, tryin' to figure out which one of her daughters should marry the prince. What she forgot was that Remy would also be lookin' for a possesion of his. She didn' have the Queen of Hearts card. Rogue did.

But Rogue couldn' get outta her room.

You gotta be kiddin' me, _Scott_. Rogue might lose the love of her life and all you can think 'bout is how she's gonna use the bathroom if she's stuck in her room? What's wit' you and the bathroom anyway, kid?

**Not much to say. Just wanna get the last two official chapters up. So if this chapter sucks, it's cause I'm just so excited to get to the ending. So I'm sorry. It'll get better. Promise.**

**NEXT CHAPTER: Remy and Rogue reunite, we add more items to the list, and play Monopoly. **

**-M.A.**


	12. And The Prince Found Her

**This IS NOT the last chapter. We still have one more "official" chapter to go. So don't give up on me yet, guys. **

**Chapter Twelve: And The Prince Found her**

From inside her room, Rogue could see Remy's carriage drivin' down the road toward her house. She had been tryin' since Mystique locked her in her room to break down the door. She was a strong gal but she won' that strong. And even wit' all that anger bubblin' up inside of her jus' wasn' 'nough to help her break down the door. But that didn' stop her.

Downstairs, Mystique opened the door and Remy and Scott entered the room. She and her daughters all curtsied. Kitty was eyeballin' Remy wit' a flirty little smile but Jean was starin' at Scott again.

Those two are pretty disgustin'.

Remy looked 'round the room, tryin' to see if the girl he met at the ball was hidin' in the room somewhere. He only had a few more houses left and he still hadn' found the girl wit' white streaks in her hair. But he didn' see her. So he jus' sighed. He still had to check the girls in the room 'cause that was the rule Charlie and Mattie set up. So he bowed 'fore the ladies and asked who would like to go first.

"Oh! Me, me, me, me, me!" Kitty screamed.

Remy sighed and approached her.

As he did this, Jean looked 'round and realized that she hadn' seen Rogue in awhile. She looked at Mystique.

"Where's Roguearella?" Jean asked. Kitty was jus' sittin' down and Remy was pullin' out the glove he had.

"Don't worry about it. She's taken care of."

"What do you mean?"

"Do you want to marry the prince or not?"

Jean looked surprised. She didn' know her mama wanted her to marry Remy. And Jean didn' wanna marry Remy. She wanted to marry Scott. And she was real worried 'bout Rogue. She looked back over at Kitty as the prince pulled out the white glove and helped her pull it on. It was jus' a little too long to fit her arm.

Remy pulled the glove off and shook his head. Then he looked at Jean.

"How 'bout you, _chere_?" he asked, smilin' politely.

'Cause she knew her mama would have a fit if she didn', Jean walked up to the prince and held out her arm. He pulled the glove on. It fit her jus' right. Remy sucked in a breath 'cause he wasn' expectin' that.

"Do you have the other glove?"

"I—"

"She does," Mystique interrupted. She showed Remy the box that had Rogue's glove inside of it.

Back upstairs, in her room, Rogue could kinda sorta hear what was happenin' downstairs and she was livid 'bout it.

Livid means very, very, very, _very _angry.

She wanted her gloves. She wanted to be happy. And she wanted Remy. And all that was between her and all those things she wanted was one wooden door.

Rogue rolled up her sleeves and decided that she was gettin' out that room. But she was runnin' out of time 'cause Remy was already takin' the glove from Mystique and puttin' it on a nervous lookin' Jean. Jean won' the only one who was nervous though.

Scott was nervous 'cause he wanted Jean.

Jean was nervous 'cause she wanted Scott.

Mystique was nervous 'cause she wanted to be filthy rich and needed this to work out.

Kitty was nervous 'cause…well, Kitty won' actually all that nervous.

And somewhere in the Quarter, Belladonna was nervous that Remy wouldn' be marryin' her.

Remy rolled the glove up Jean's arm and that one fit too. He looked up into her eyes and asked her if she had his special possession. That made Mystique unhappy 'cause she forgot all 'bout the special thing Remy was lookin' for. And she didn' have whatever he was lookin' for.

'Fore anyone in the room could say anythin', there was a loud crash from upstairs. They heard wood splinterin' followed by some not so nice words bein' yelled real loudly. Remy lifted an eyebrow and looked at Mystique suspiciously.

"What was that noise?" he asked.

"Um…."

"Is there another girl in this house somewhere?"

"Well…."

Then Rogue appeared at the top of the stairs. Her dress was kinda torn and she looked real tired and worn out and her shoulder was probably bruised from breakin' down the door. She was breahin' heavily but when she saw Remy standin' at the bottom of the stairs lookin' up at her with his mouth open in shock, she grinned at him.

"Jean," she said, tryin' to slow her breathin' down a little. "Gimme my gloves back."

Wit'out hesitatin', Jean happily pulled off the gloves and handed them to Remy. Rogue came down to Remy, who started smilin' when he saw it was her. She held out her hands and waited.

Kids, wit' all the tenderness in the world, Remy rolled one, then the other glove onto her arms. And jus' like they were s'posed to, they fit jus' right. Liftin' her hand up to his face, he kissed the back of her hand softly, never breakin' eye contact wit' her. It made Rogue blush 'cause the look he was givin' her was…well…

Ladies, one day, some boy is gonna give you that look. And when he does, you gonna blush too. But don' let him keep lookin' at you like that. Instead, you punch him the stomach, tell him it was from your buddy Remy LeBeau, and run in the opposite direction. Don' ever forget that, kay?

"I s'pose that you got my card, don' you?"

Rogue reached into a pocket of her dress and pulled out the ol' Queen of Hearts card. "You s'pose correct."

"Am I allowed to kiss you this time?"

Rogue hesitated. But she looked up into his eyes and decided that if ever there was a time for her to control her powers, now was the time. So she leaned forward and kissed Remy LeBeau square on the mouth.

And he didn' pass out.

So Rogue kept on kissin' him. And he kissed her too and—it is not mushy! Stop laughin'—it was like everythin' in their world started to make sense. There weren' no Belladonna and there weren' no Mystique and there weren' no one who could ruin their moment. 'Cause they found each other and they weren' gonna let each other go.

Someday kids, you gonna meet someone who'll make your troubles melt 'way. Somethin' might come up and it might make you wanna give up on that person.

Don't.

No matter how hard things get you keep them. It don' matter if she leaves you to die in Antarctica and you may or may not have become a horseman for a mutant bent on destroyin' everythin', you don' let them go.

Don' ask too many questions, a happy endin' is waitin' for you, don' ever stop tryin', no one has it perfect, don' run away from your responsibilities, learn French, don' hit a man in that one spot, don' always trust a pretty face, don' let the ones who hurt you have the satisfaction of seein' you upset, don' let your anger consume you, everythin' is better wit' Cheyenne pepper, violence is not the answer but sometimes it's the only solution, kill rats and birds 'cept for blue fuzzy ones named Kurt, Kitty is the evil step sister, and when you find someone you love more than anythin' else, don' let them go.

Eventually, Remy and Rogue stopped kissin'. He grinned up at her all goofily and took hold of her hands real tight.

"I love you," he told her, kissin' her on the nose. "I don' know your name but I love you very much."

"Rogue. My name is Rogue. And I love you, too."

"You wanna get married then, _Cherie_?"

"Bite me."

"Sweetheart, as soon as the weddin' is over, I'll be happy to do that. Wherever you want me to for long as you want." He winked at her. "Promise."

Rogue punched Remy when he said that. But after he could breathe again, he and Rogue left her ol' home—takin' Jean and Scott wit' them—and they had a nice little weddin' at the Quarter.

And after they got married, Remy took Rogue up to his room and….

How old did y'all say you were? Five? Six. Heh. I see. Um…

Okay. After they got married, Remy took Rogue up to his room and they played Monopoly. That's right. Monopoly. They played Monopoly all day long. And when the day was over, they played it all night long too.

Remy was very good at Monopoly. He could also play for very long periods of time. He knew all sorts of techniques to winnin' Monopoly. He was great at it. Rogue, she had never played before but she was very enthusiastic. That made up for her inexperience. She even managed to surprise Remy a few times herself.

They went up to Remy's room and played Monopoly for two straight days without stoppin'. There were quite a few times where Remy was so good at Monopoly, he made Rogue scream his name.

Loudly.

Together, Rogue and Remy both found their own...happy endin's.

**NEXT CHAPTER: we finally found out where Remy got the kids from and get a much anticipated happily ever after. **


	13. And They Lived Happily Ever After

**The last official chapter has arrived! This is a bittersweet moment for me but I'm so glad you guys liked me enough to keep reviewing and keep reading. It means a lot. So thank you. And even though this is the last official chapter, you should keep your eyes peeled for some "alternate ending" chapters where I incorporate my favorite ideas of where Mr. LeBeau got the children from. And after that, maybe you should keep your eyes out for a sequel of sorts that will be titled "The Aftermath of Remy LeBeau". What's it about? Who will it star? Will there be more Monopoly? Who knows. I suppose you should just wait and see. But time for the ending...**

**Chapter Thirteen: And They Lived Happily Ever After**

Remy LeBeau looked around the room at the thirteen pairs of eyes staring up at him in a combination of adoration and curiosity. He tucked away the cards he had been shuffling during the duration of his story. He smiled at the kids.

"How'd you like the story, kiddos?" he asked, grinning at them.

All of the children answered at once. Though it was hard to hear, the answers were all ones of approval. Pride swelled in his chest. He hadn't expected this endeavor to go as well as it did or for him to have enjoyed himself so much.

"I'm glad y'all liked it."

"How come you didn't say they lived happily ever after?" the one named Scott asked with a raised hand. Remy's smile faded.

"''Cause that would be cliché. That's how all the other stories ended. But this is the Remy LeBeau version. Didn' I mention somethin' 'bout you askin' stupid questions, _Scott_?"

"I liked the ending," the dark haired one named Amy said, bouncing up and down enthusiastically. "I liked the whole story. It's much better than the original story."

"Thank you, Amy," Remy said, smiling once more. He looked down at the watch on his wrist, surprised at the time. His grin faded. "Well, y'all, looks like it's time for ol' Remy to be headin' on home."

There was a chorus of saddened wails and protests. But the Cajun just shook his head mournfully.

"I gotta go, kids."

"Will you come back?" Amy asked.

He winked at the girl who he had become very fond of. "You can count on it, _Cherie_."

He stood up from where he was sitting on the floor. He started to walk out the room but stopped short. He turned back around and knelt before Amy. She gave him a curious look.

"I want you to have somethin'."

"What?"

He reached into the pocket of his duster and pulled out a single card. He handed it to the girl. She smile was bright when she saw which card it was.

"Queen of Hearts."

"Every princess needs one."

Tousling her hair and kissing her forehead, the prince of thieves stood up once more and walked out the room.

He left the Bayville Public Library with a little extra swagger in his steps. He was quite pleased, which was surprising under the circumstances. But as much as he was enjoying himself, he was ready to go home.

So Remy LeBeau hopped on his gallant steed—a beautiful motorcycle that would have cost him a fortune had he not stolen it—and sped away to his home.

He arrived at the Xavier Institute for Gifted Youngsters in no time (but then again, he had been travelling at almost a hundred miles per hour), parked his beloved steed inside the garaged and headed inside. He waltzed past the young girls who swooned at the sight of him, past Bobby building an ice fortress in the common room, past Jean and Scott sucking face in the hallway, past his bedroom, past a glowering Wolverine holding a beer, and right to Rogue's room. Without knocking, he threw the door open.

"Roguey, I'm home."

She didn't even look up from the book she was reading on her bed. "Don't call me, Roguey."

"What should I call you then?" he asked, closing the door securely behind him. "Rogue? Anna Marie? Jus' plain ol' Anna? Southern Goddess Who I Worship Above All Others?"

"I like the last one." She closed the book at last and looked up at her grinning boyfriend. "How was community service?"

Remy faked a sneer. "Awful," he lied.

"What did you have to do?"

"Read to a buncha snot nosed kids. They were horrible. They didn' listen to anythin' I said. Threw applesauce at my head. Let's never have kids. 'Parently, I'm jus' awful wit' them."

Rogue laughed, completely unaware that Remy LeBeau was (once again) lying through his teeth. But he had a reputation to uphold. If word got out that Remy LeBeau had a way with kids, people might start thinking he was a nice guy or something.

And Remy LeBeau did not want that.

"That's fine with me, Swamp Rat," Rogue said, still laughing. "But I hope this taught you a lesson."

This time, Remy's frown was not faked. "Humph."

"Serves you right."

"He deserved it!" he insisted.

"I don't care how big of an ass Scott was bein', that doesn't mean you can blow up his car—"

"But, Roguey!"

"—'specially with him in it!"

"Humph."

"You're just lucky that community service with those little monsters was all the professor assigned you."

"Well, I wouldn' call them 'monsters' exactly…."

Rogue lifted a challenging eyebrow. "Oh, really?"

He decided it was time for a subject change. He cast his eyes down onto Rogue's gloved hands. "Why do you insist on wearin' these things? You can control your powers now."

"Habit," she answered with a little shrug.

"Well, it's a bad one." He crawled onto the bed, sliding up the length of her body. He plucked the book from her hands and tossed it on the floor. With it out the way, he closed the distance between their bodies. "Remy is jus' gonna havta break you out of it."

"And how to you plan on doin' that, Cajun?"

He kissed her slowly, feeling no need to rush. His mouth just moved against her in long, languid drags. He took his time working them both up to the point where they tuned out the rest of the world and got lost together. And his Rogue seemed quite content to get lost with him.

Remy LeBeau loved Rogue more than anything else and he had no intention of ever letting her go.

Eventually, he lifted his head and looked at the woman in his arms.

"You know what I wanna do tonight, _Cherie_?" he asked huskily. Rogue shivered at the tenor in his voice that vibrated through her body.

"What?"

"Let's play Monopoly."

Rogue did not know what Remy meant. So he showed her.

That night, they found a happy ending.

But together, they found a happily ever after.

***tear drop* It's over. I can't believe it's over. *sigh* It's like watching a child go off to college...or something like that...**

**Anyway, you might not hear from me for a little bit because I've got a book to write, homework to do, and a boyfriend to love. But I will be back! There will be more Romy goodness! And there will be a oneshot sequel. Until, I'll see y'all soon. I hope you enjoyed my twisted little fairy tale. Much love. **

**-M.A.**


	14. Alternate Ending One

**Congratulations, Where the plum tree lie! Your idea is our first alternate ending as to where Remy Got The Children from. Thanks for the ideas! More to come soon!**

"Cajun, what in the blue hell are you doing here?"

Remy lifted his head, smiling cockily at the woman who stood so defiantly in front of him. The children who he had been entertaining for almost an hour turned to look at the woman who had intruded on their story. He shook his head with faux disappointment.

"Tsch, tsch, Roguey. Watch your language in front of the chil'ren."

Rogue looked down at the thirteen pairs of eyes staring up at her curiously. She seemed to only just now notice them. She blushed a little, abashed that she had used such language in front of a group of what looked like kids that were no older than six.

But that raised a few questions in her mind. First, there was the most obvious one:

What the hell was Remy LeBeau doing at the Bayville Park?

There was another question that was equally interesting and mindboggling, which was why was Remy LeBeau—the ex-Acolyte for Magneto, current Prince of Thieves, and most recently, Rogue's stalker—doing with a group of innocent looking children?

More confusing, why did the kids look like they were _fond_ of the Cajun Casanova?

Something about this wrong. Really, really wrong. It was so wrong, Rogue couldn't even begin to understand or fathom what was happening. So she just stood there, looking at Remy sitting on a park bench shuffling cards and then down to the kids, who sat at his feet.

"Remy," a dark haired girl said softly. She pointed at Rogue. "Is that Roguearella?"

He grinned. "Yes it is, darlin' Amy."

The kids all looked up at Rogue as if they were in the presence of some sort of god. But all she could manage to do was ask incredulously, "Roguearella?"

Another child, blond and gangly looking, addressed Remy. "Are you two married?"

"WHAT?"

Remy was not smiling anymore. He frowned at the child with the sort of dislike that she had never seen on his handsome features before. "No, _Scott_, this ain't a fairy tale. This is the real world and in the real world, we ain't married."

Rogue grew a little angry. "_Married_?"

The children and Gambit ignored her. Instead, a freckled child raised her hand.

"Is she your girlfriend in the real world?"

"NO!"

Remy shrugged with the sort of nonchalance that irked Rogue to an endless degree. "I wouldn' say that, per se."

"I wouldn't say it at all!"

Again, she was ignored.

"Does that mean Wolverine is real, too?" the one called Amy asked.

"It sure does, _chere_."

Amy looked up at Rogue again. "Did Wolverine use his pink testosterone magic to help you get here?"

"Pink…testosterone…what?"

"Pink testosterone magic!" Scott exclaimed with glee. "Does he really wear a pink tutu and have glitter powers and his powers don't work at midnight?"

Rogue gawked.

"I wanna see Jean!" another kid hollered. Several others nodded in agreement.

"I wanna see Kurt! Kurt, Kurt, Kurt, Kurt!"

Before she could fully register that a small child was chanting her brother's name, a rock sailed by Rogue's head. She squealed and ducked, wondering now if she were under attack. But the rock bounced off a tree branch, startling a small bird. The child who threw the rock pouted.

"_Merde_," the kid said. "I missed."

"What did he just say, LeBeau?" the Goth demanded, unsure if she had really just heard a five year old swear in French.

"_Merde, Merde, Merde, Merde, Merde_!"

"Roguearella, why is there white streaks in your hair?" a red head boy asked. The girl next to him pinched his arm and shushed him.

"You aren't supposed to ask questions, remember?"

"Oh yeah."

"Hey, Roguearella, we don't like Mystique."

"WHAT?"

"Mystique sucks!"

"Yeah! She sucks! She's a _chienne_!"

The X-Man's jaw hit the ground at that. She lifted her emerald eyes to Remy's red and black ones. They danced naughtily. When she continued to glare, he winked at her. It did not go unnoticed by the children.

"Ooooooooooooohhhhh," they chorused in unison.

Remy and Rogue both rolled her eyes at that.

"LeBeau, I need a moment of your time."

"For you, _Cherie_, I would give you a lifetime."

"Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww."

"Just shut up and get you're a—butt over here."

Remy stepped over the children to get to his fellow southerner. When he was close enough, Rogue took hold of his arm and yanked him out of earshot of the kids who watched them with large, intrusive eyes.

"What the hell are you doin' here with these kids? What did you teach them? Did you steal them?"

He grinned at her bemusedly. "What do you think I'm doin' here, Roguey? And, _non_, I didn' _steal_ them. "

"Stalkin' me."

"That's such a harsh term, _chere_. Remy likes to think of it as—"

"Followin' me in a manner that needs inconspicuous clothin'. Yeah, yeah. You've said that before."

"And binoculars. You forget the binoculars," he added with the sort of innocence that had fooled countless people. At this moment in time, Rogue was not one of them. "And in regards to where I managed to procure a group of chil'ren, it really was harmless. I was jus' sittin' here when one them walked up to me and asked 'bout my eyes. Then a few more came over. Next thing I knew, I was surrounded and they were jus' lookin' up at me wit' them big ol' eyes. So I told them a little story."

"A story teller?" She snorted. "You? I'm not an idiot, Gambit."

"Never said you were, Roguearella."

She eyed him suspiciously when he called her that. "What kinda story did you tell those kids?"

"Jus' a Cinderella story wit' a patent Remy LeBeau twist on it."

She looked back at the children. One of them was still throwing rocks at birds. Another was chanting French swear words with disturbingly fabulous pronunciation. Across from that child, girl was trying to mediate a fight between two boys who both apparently wanted to be the pink, fairy version of Wolverine. Two other children appeared to be reenacting a scene from Remy's fairy tale.

Her eyes slid back over to the man standing next to her.

"What have you done?"

"Jus' corrupted the youth a little, is all. If you want, Remy can corrupt you a little too."

"Gambit," she growled warningly.

"But the kinda corruption I wanna do to you is far too…explicit for the kiddies to be exposed to."

"LeBeau…."

"But Remy knows quite a few places where he can corrupt you until the wee hours of the mornin'."

"REMY LEBAEU, YOU ARE—"

What was sure to be a very thorough tongue lashing was cut off by a tug on Remy's duster. He and Rogue both looked down. Amy was staring up at them.

"Remy?"

"Yes, punkin?"

"You're the real prince Remy, right?"

"_Oui_."

"And that's the real Roguearella, right?"

"_Oui_."

"Did you find her?"

"We…found each other under some not so pleasant circumstances."

"You mean how you tried to blow off my hand with a charged card?" Rogue interjected. Remy just winked at her, his smile as wolfish as it was appealing.

Amy's brow furrowed at the last part but she seemed to disregard it. "So if she's the real Rogue and you're the real prince, does that mean…?"

Kneeling down, Remy shushed the girl with the kind of grin that worried Rogue. But he and the child exchanged a knowing look that left her as concerned as it did curious. She watched as Remy ruffled Amy's hair. It was more affectionate than she would have ever expected from the man with the naughty smile and dangerous habits. It kind of warmed her heart.

Kind of.

"It does mean that, _petite_, but Rogue don' know it yet."

"Know? Know what? What are y'all talkin' 'bout?

He went on as if she hadn't spoken. "So, until she figures it out, it's jus' gonna havta be a secret 'tween you and me, kay?"

"_Oui_!" Amy said with the childlike enthusiasm.

He kissed her forehead before standing up. "_Oui_, indeed. You will go far, _chere_. Trust ol' Remy."

"I do."

"Bad idea," Rogue mumbled under her breath. Remy pinched her. "Ow."

"But, my darlin' Amy, we gotta be on our way."

The child pouted. "Noooooooo."

"_Oui_. I gotta go. But don' worry. I gotta feelin' we might bump into each other now and then."

"Really?"

"Would I lie to you? You know what, don' answer that." He looped an arm around the still very bewildered Rogue. He not-so-gently guided her away from the children toward an exit. "Come on, Roguey. Why don' we get outta here and have some fun, eh?"

"Um…" She went along, partly because she was too muddled to protest. Partly because she liked how his arm felt around her shoulder and didn't want the feeling to go away quite yet.

"You know what sounds like fun, Roguey?"

Rogue looked up at Remy with a raised eyebrow, skeptical. "What, Cajun?"

"Monopoly."

"Monopoly? How is that fun?"

"_Chere_, it would be my pleasure to show how much Monopoly can truly be."

They left the park together, walking toward the happily ever after Rogue was unaware of and the one Remy couldn't wait for.

**Sorry. Couldn't resist Monopoly. But if Remy LeBeau said he wanted to play Monopoly with you, would you be able to resist? I didn't think so. More alternate endings to come soon everyone. Until then...**

**-M.A.**


	15. Alternate Ending Two

**Congrats, Indy! You're our other alternate ending!**

The moment Remy ended his story, he lifted his eyes heavenward. The look in those eyes was far from amused. He stood, crossing his arms in front of him impatiently. Despite his black demeanor, a wry smile tugged at his lips.

He watched as all thirteen children—Amy and Scott included—faded into nothingness. He was left standing in a large, empty room. Above him, there was an observation room. He saw what looked like the entire Xavier Institute watching him through the glass, some holding popcorn and beverages. They all had different expressions on their faces, though.

Wolverine didn't look pleased. Which wasn't any different than usual. The man had a broad range of emotion: grim to grimmer.

Kitty looked downright pissed. Which was odd for her. Not that Remy cared.

The professor looked amused. As did Jean. Her one-eyed boyfriend didn't though. Which Remy was pleased about.

Kurt looked kind of…disappointed.

Tabby looked thoroughly delighted. She typically looked like some variation of that, though.

Everyone else looked rather entertained with his tale.

And Rogue? She looked…satisfied. Which was odd.

"Well?" the Cajun asked after a prolonged silence.

Everyone answered at once.

"Why was _I _the evil one?"

"Why was I the messenger slave?"

"Servant. You were a servant, Scott. Don't be insensitive."

"Pink testosterone magic?"

"I thought it was cute—"

"Why was I rat?"

"—even though the kids probably could have gone without the 'French lesson.'"

"I only appear in the story once and it's as a rat. Not fair."

"Pink testosterone magic, Gumbo?"

"Ha ha. Yeah. The image of you in a tutu was…erm, nevermind."

"I liked it."

"Of course _you _did. You weren't the 'evil' sister."

"Or a slave for Gambit."

"For the last time Scott, you were a _servant_."

"Pink. Testosterone. Magic."

"I mean, between me and Jean, clearly Jean is the more evil of the two."

"Hey!"

"Oh, come on! You were the host to a crazy cosmic firebird! You're the more evil!"

"What happened during that period was not my fault."

"_Pink. Testosterone. Magic._"

"I feel like I could have been incorporated in the story a little more."

"Who's Mattie?"

"Yeah, who is Mattie?"

"I feel like that we shouldn't let Gambit around children. Like, ever."

"I think the only way that anyone would leave him with their kids for any length of time is in an alternate reality where Remy is a responsible young man."***

"Ha. Right."

"Seriously. Who's Mattie?"

"Why wasn't Storm in the story?"

"Yeah. Where was Storm?"

"Where was _I_, Remy?"

"I'm just glad this was Danger Room Session. If any of that were real, those kids would be so scarred for life. I mean, _Monopoly_."

"You wanna play Monopoly tonight?"

"Your place or mine?"

"Seriously. That was a screwed up innuendo."

"PINK TESTOSTERONE MAGIC?"

Logan's explosion silenced everyone in the observation room. Remy only quirked an eyebrow when all six of his claws popped out with their signature "snikt." Several students grabbed hold of the man before he could dive through the window, into the Danger Room, and try to kill the Cajun.

Again.

Remy didn't care about any of that. Not Logan or his peers' reaction to his story. None of that. What he was concerned with was why, in the middle of everyone's criticism of his story, hadn't Rogue uttered a word. Which concerned him. Since she was the one who had convinced him to go into the Danger Room for an impromptu training session.

He thought she just wanted to watch him work out. Instead, she turned on that stupid story time simulation (something he didn't even know the Danger Room was equipped with) and told him he couldn't leave until he completed it like it was real.

When it was over, he couldn't say he was surprised to see the entire Institute watching with his wife. He was a little embarrassed that he had to do the stupid story time and everyone watched. He was more than a little embarrassed that he had gotten kind of attached to the Amy hologram. But he was at least amused that, during his story, he still managed to get under several of his teammates skin with his fairy tale characterization of them.

Hence the aforementioned wry smile.

Remy waited for everyone to quiet down before finally speaking.

"Now that everyone got their ha-ha's in at Remy's expense, will y'all please get me the hell outta here?"

No one moved. They just stared at the perturbed X-Man. He met his wife's gaze despite the distance between them. It was a breathless moment before Rogue finally smiled broadly at Remy. He watched her disappear from the observation room with bemused eyes. After a minute, she appeared in the Danger Room, several feet between them.

"You gonna splain why you put Remy through that?"

She nodded. "Yup." She took a step toward him.

"Does it have anythin' to do wit' your sick sense of humor?" he asked, taking a step toward her.

She took another step. "Yup."

"Was there any real reason for this story time?" Remy inquired, coming nearer.

"Yup."

As the space between them closed, Remy found it increasingly difficult to remain angry with Rogue. Not when she was so close. Not when she was smiling that secretive smile like she was. His hands twitched as he fought the urge to just grab her and hold her. Instead, Rogue was to one to grab him. Just by the hand. But she held on intently.

"I liked your twisted story, Rems," she murmured, her voice soft. It confused him a little.

"That's…good, I s'pose."

"I thought it was cute. A little…." She scrunched up her nose. "Inappropriate. But it's not like I spect things to be otherwise with you. Course we'll havta clean it up a bit."

"What? Why?"

She smiled. He continued to gawk at her in confusion. When Rogue did not answer his question, Remy suddenly noticed that the hand she had been holding so firmly was now resting on her stomach. His fingers were splayed out across the flat, firm tummy. He stared at the stomach, his hand, and her face for almost a minute before it clicked.

"Oh," was all he said.

"Remy."

"Uh?"

"You're gonna be a daddy."

"Uh," he said, nodding numbly.

Immediately after hearing this news, Remy LeBeau promptly fainted. He was happy to be on his way to a brand new once upon a time.

It was the stuff that came in between that and the happily ever after that frightened him.

*****Another one of Indy's idea's that I unfortunately don't have time to actually type up.**

**I'm off now, to work on the sequel and another chapter story, Knee High Socks. Of course, that last one will probably take some time. Until them, look out for more one shots. I wish I had more time to incoporate more alternate endings, but my fingers are just itching to move onto something fresh and new and funny and romantic and fluffy and even a little SEXY. Until then...**

**-M.A.**


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